Junk food advertising has a harmful effect on society and should be banned. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Nowadays
people
are increasing the
past
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
food
eat. It has a negative
effect
on
society
so
people
must understand that it is a
side
effect
and that should limited. I totally agree with
this
and I will discuss it. On the one hand, fastly these days
people
are very busy and they are convenient to eat fast
food
and they do not have to know about that
knowledge
after there is a
side
effect
.
for instance
, a company of fast
food
like pizza, burgers, Coca-Cola, etc.
That is
an increasing number of
people
who are convenient to easy for a busy lifestyle. I think the government must give advice to
society
about how they control it
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
. They should
can
Verb problem
be
show examples
limited and they can banned
due to
more and more
side
effects of fast
food
.
On the other hand
,
secondly
, the government should give
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
knowledge
about
society
.
For example
,Like an advertising. Because
people
are always watching TV they can
take
Verb problem
gain
show examples
knowledge
about it. They should given to the program about eating fast
food
what
Correct word choice
and what
show examples
is the
side
effects. The main
effect
is increasing nowadays
society
majority of
people
have noncommunicable diseases.
Such
as cancer, diabetes, pressure, cholesterol, etc.
Therefore
, always con remember
society
fast
food
is convenient to eat but there are more and more bad
side
effects.
This
is the way
people
shout understand and they must be limited to the
used
Replace the word
use
show examples
it
Change preposition
of it
show examples
. In conclusion, increasing the eating fast
food
number of
people
and they should have
knowledge
about how
side
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
eating fast
food
.
therefore
,
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
show examples
should
bannded
Correct your spelling
banned
banded
to it
they
Correct word choice
so they
show examples
can give to
knowledge
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
society
Change preposition
about health
show examples
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
food
benefits and
limited
Replace the word
limit
show examples
fast
food
.
Submitted by ma.ushamanu1024 on

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Task Achievement
In the introduction, explicitly state your position regarding the topic. This helps readers understand your standpoint from the beginning.
Coherence & Cohesion
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General
Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and syntax to enhance readability and professionalism of your essay. Consider revising phrases like 'Nowadays people are increasing the past food eat' for clarity.
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