Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience
One of the most prevalent trends in the contemporary world is the cumulative increase in the population moving overseas
in
different Change preposition
to
language spoken
countries, where they can face communications and Add a hyphen
language-spoken
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
language
issues. In my view, I am
completely Verb problem
apply
agreed
with the given statement, which can cause financial and cultural problems. Wrong verb form
agree
This
stance will be proven by carefully analysing why moving to other nations is difficult.
On the one hand, the main reason is that cultural shock. When anyone move
to Change the verb form
moves
the
new state Correct article usage
a
and
traveller cannot speak their native Correct word choice
apply
language
. It becomes very difficult to communicate with them. You cannot express your views and emotions. Another factor is that in case of emergency
if anyone Add a comma
emergency,
get
sick and Change the verb form
gets
admitted
Add a missing verb
is admitted
in
the hospital, it becomes very hard to explain Change preposition
to
about
his pains, which Change preposition
apply
some time
Replace the word
sometimes
Wrong verb form
results
resulted
the death of the patient. Add the preposition
resulted in
resulted from
For example
, if a foreigner wants to buy grocery
from the supermarket, he cannot get Fix the agreement mistake
groceries
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
due to
lack of language
barrier. As a result
, it is evident an Indian citizen unable to understand Russian words.
Secondly
, employment, the primary reason is that a staff unable to get technical jobs, where native speaking require
. It will be difficult for them to understand and explain any technical queries. Wrong verb form
required
In addition
, involvement
in their local cultural activities, immigrant cannot take part in events Change preposition
to involvement
due to
less understanding of their vocabulary. As a consequence
, it is apparent why folks are not interested to travel
in different councils.
In conclusion, the analysis of travelling in different capitals to get some knowledge about their culture, Change preposition
in traveling
however
it is very difficult in the starting to settle and work there. Add the comma(s)
however,
However
, it is predicted this
development of moving humans in
different countries is going to continue in the future as well for doing Change preposition
to
businesses
and Fix the agreement mistake
business
explore
their system.Wrong verb form
exploring
Submitted by rbtech65 on
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coherence cohesion
You need to improve the organization of your essay by clearly dividing it into paragraphs, each with a single coherent idea. Use transition words between paragraphs to guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your main points should be more supported with specific examples or more detailed explanations. This will help in making your argument more convincing.
task achievement
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the question asked, covering all aspects of the prompt. You did well in stating your opinion, but incorporating a more balanced view with contrasting arguments would enrich your response.
task achievement
Work on clarifying your ideas to make them more comprehensible. Try to simplify complex sentences to avoid ambiguity and improve the overall readability of your essay.
task achievement
Including more relevant, specific examples from real-life or hypothetical scenarios can enhance your essay. This adds credibility to your arguments and makes them more persuasive.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example