Children who are brought up in families that do not have large amounts of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children grow up with wealthy parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree whit this option?

#children #families #amounts #money #adult #life #parents #whit #option

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It is claimed that when individuals with a

farher

Correct your spelling

father

or mother with lower financial means grow up, their ability to cope with life is more developed than those raised by them with more financial means. In

this

Linking Words

artical

Correct your spelling

article

, I will explain to what extent I fit or unfit with the stated claim.

Firstly

Linking Words

, kids from less affluent

relations

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relationships

show examples

may develop resilience and trouble-solving skills. Growing up without wealth teaches them to navigate challenges with limited resources, fostering ingenuity and adaptability.

Also

Linking Words

, wealth disparity can

instill

Change the spelling

instil

show examples

a strong work ethic. The necessity to contribute to the household's monetary

wellbeing

Correct your spelling

well-being

show examples

from a young age teaches the value of hard work, diligence, and responsibility.

Moreover

Linking Words

, fiscal struggle often highlights the importance of education as a means of upward mobility.

This

Linking Words

can motivate

them

Correct pronoun usage

those

show examples

from less well-off backgrounds to pursue higher schooling and personal development actively.

Conversely

Linking Words

they

Correct pronoun usage

those

show examples

from wealthy backgrounds might have access to better educational resources, extracurricular activities, and networks, which could

also

Linking Words

prepare them for adult life in different, highly beneficial ways.

In addition

Linking Words

, the psychological impact of riches on upbringing should not be overlooked. Youngs from less affluent backgrounds might face stress and insecurities that could hinder their development,

while

Linking Words

those from opulent domestics might develop a sense of entitlement or lack of resilience.

As a result

Linking Words

, life coping skills may be linked to their group and some money issues from the past, and

this

Linking Words

can affect individuals' lives

bot

Correct your spelling

both

show examples

positively and negatively. I

both

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

sympathize and

non-sympathize

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sympathise

show examples

with

this

Linking Words

opinion. I believe that everything depends on the person's own effort.

Submitted by ecem.tekben on Fri Mar 22 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

Improve the clarity of your main points by outlining them more distinctly in the introduction. This will help the reader understand what to expect in your essay and enhance coherence.

Coherence & Cohesion & Task Achievement

Use more specific examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more convincing, helping to improve both task achievement and coherence & cohesion.

Language

Check your essay for unintended errors in spelling and grammar. Also, focus on improving the variety and accuracy of your sentence structures.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

affluent
resilience
problem-solving skills
ingenuity
adaptability
wealth disparity
work ethic
diligence
responsibility
upward mobility
extracurricular activities
psychological impact
insecurities
sense of entitlement

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Children who are brought up in families that do not have large amounts of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children grow up with wealthy parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree whit this option?

Fully explain your ideas

The government needs to spend money to encourage the development of sports and arts for school students, rather than to support professional sports and art events. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Differences between countries are becoming less evident. Nowadays people are watching the same films, brands, advertisements and TV channels. To what extent do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advanatges?

As a results of tourism and the increasing number of people travelling, there is an growing demand for more flights. what problems does this have on the environment? what measures could be taken to solve the problem?

In a public-funded healthcare system, people who are willing to pay for the best and fast treatment should be able to do so. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?