The line graph shows the information average number of visitors entering a museum in summer and winter in 2003. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
The line graph provides us with
the
data about the two seasons of the year, which are summertime and coldCorrect article usage
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,
when the community went to the gallery in the year 2003.
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Overall
, the most visited season was in vacation, it saw the most dramatic increase at 12pm from the lowest at 6pm. Whilst in cold witnessed the least rise of the crowd.
In Summer, we could see most of the double population that attempted in Winter to the institution. It started to have a great number of people at 10am but it had the highest number of citizens at 12pm with just over 1400, however
, this
steadily decreased to 800 of the public at 4pm, and since that moment had a dramatic drop until 6pm.
In Winter, it began with just 400 guests at 10am, until 12pm which reached a peak of 600 citizens, but even that is
below than in Summer, however
, it started a dramatic decrease at 3pm, when the museum stayed empty until it closed.
To sum up
, people love to go to the gallery in Summer,
when the peak hour is at 12pmRemove the comma
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,
when is most full. Remove the comma
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Nevertheless
, in Winter, it is the least crowded.Submitted by catherina.manrique.aguinaga on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words pm with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "dramatic" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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