IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world, do you think this is a positive or negative development.

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In
contemporary
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the contemporary
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 world,
globalization
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 is inevitably becoming a
trend
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, and it not only brings us benefits, but
also
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 raises some concerning issues. The public
have
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has
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 not reached a consensus about whether it is a good
trend
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 that the similarity among different
countries
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are
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is
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 rising
due to
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 individuals' ability to purchase the same products worldwide. In my opinion, like two sides of a coin,
this
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trend
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 has both positive and negative effects, but in summary, it's beneficial to our society. On one hand, an open global market could stimulate benign
competitions
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competition
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 among companies
,
Correct word choice
and,therefore
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therefore
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, improve qualities
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improving the quality
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 of products. With
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globalization
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the globalization
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 of merchants, consumers around the world are provided with more affluent choices than before. Meanwhile, they can enjoy
the
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apply
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equal
serve
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service
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 wherever they are
in
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apply
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. The
internationally exchanging
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international exchange
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 of commodities would
also
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 bring up
prosperity
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the prosperity
a prosperity
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 of other industries.
For instance
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, freight and advertising industries would gain more incoming through
this
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 process, which is beneficial to
the
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apply
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international economic growth.
On the other hand
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, different sorts of diversities are still necessary, and
globalization
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, despite
it
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apply
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contributed
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contributing
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 a lot to every nation involved
in
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apply
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, would harm those diversities to some degree. Considering the fact that the price and quality of a product are the only things to be concerned
in
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about in
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 a transaction, some domestic special crafts would not be competitive enough and vanish in
this
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trend
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. Those crafts and skills represent the unique culture of their country
,
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apply
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 and should be conserved properly. Luckily, the global prevalence of certain commodities doesn't mean the similarity is replacing the diversity totally. The most impacted areas are restricted within finance, and manufacturing
countries
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 still keep their distinctive traditions and culture in other aspects. In conclusion,
although
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 it has been
concerned
Verb problem
considered
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 to cause damage to involving
countries
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, the
globalization
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 of products still contributes a lot to those
countries
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. In summary, it does more good than harm. I personally think it is a positive development.

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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the logical structure of your essay, ensure that each paragraph clearly focuses on a distinct main idea and transitions smoothly to the next. Introduce each paragraph with a topic sentence that previews the main idea.
Coherence & Cohesion
For an even stronger introduction and conclusion, consider adding a succinct summary of the main arguments or a restatement of your position in the conclusion to reinforce your stance more clearly.
Coherence & Cohesion
Support your main points with more detailed examples and evidence. Specific examples not only reinforce your arguments but also make your essay more persuasive and engaging.
Task Achievement
To fully address the task, make sure every part of the question is answered. Tailor your argument so it directly responds to whether the global uniformity of products is positive or negative, explaining why and providing balanced viewpoints.
Task Achievement
Clarify and expand on your ideas for a more comprehensive response. This involves explaining the implications of your points more thoroughly and exploring the differences between your arguments.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more specific and relevant examples to support your arguments, which will help illustrate your points more effectively and make your essay more convincing to the reader.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • globalization
  • diversity
  • homogenization
  • cultural assimilation
  • global connection
  • local businesses
  • economic impact
  • consumerism
  • standardization
  • westernization
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