Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Nowadays, technological progress has been drastically improved. Every day at least there are new upgraded technologies
such
as computers
. As a device
that have
a function to Change the verb form
has
manipulates
information and data, Wrong verb form
manipulate
computers
become the most ingenuity device
of the last
hundred years. In fact, I agree with those who feel that computers
are
the most creative creation Wrong verb form
have been
for
the Change preposition
of
last
hundred years.
On the one hand, it could be argued that computers
did not the
most Add a missing verb
have the
essentials
technologies over a century. Change the noun form
essential
For instance
, in order to used
Change the verb
use
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
a computer
computers
computers
it will need electricity for providing
power to Change preposition
to provide
computers
. So
Rephrase
Thus
that
, despite Correct determiner usage
apply
bring
Change the verb form
bringing
easyness
for Correct your spelling
ease
human
, Fix the agreement mistake
humans
computers
transform
these days society to outrageous. For Wrong verb form
have transformed
the
example, it is quite normal to meet Correct article usage
apply
people
at the
restaurant looking for electricity to charge their Correct article usage
a
device
.
On the Fix the agreement mistake
devices
others
hand, the innovation of Correct quantifier usage
other
computers
have
a massive change to human Change the verb form
has
civilzation
and customs. Rather than, Correct your spelling
civilisation
stay
in Wrong verb form
staying
tradisonal
conditions, Correct your spelling
traditional
computers
changes
Change the verb form
change
people
habit Change noun form
people's
into
Change preposition
in
a modern ways
. Correct the article-noun agreement
a modern way
modern ways
Computer
Fix the agreement mistake
Computers
is
able to support Correct subject-verb agreement
are
human
in several things like calculation, communication, and memory storage. With Fix the agreement mistake
humans
computers
help, Change noun form
computer's
computers'
people
could save their
time Correct pronoun usage
apply
on manage
their work faster. Change preposition
in managing
Moreover
, becausre
Correct your spelling
because
the
release of Artificial Intelligence Change preposition
of the
people
could experienced
another level of technology.
In conclusion, Change the verb form
experience
computers
not
only the most Add a missing verb
are not
essentials
technology Change the noun form
essential
for
Change preposition
of
a
centuryCorrect article usage
the
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
a greater
Correct word choice
great
device
for human
to help them Add an article
a human
the human
to
simplify their life. I, Verb problem
apply
therefore
, remain firmly convinced that computers
is
the most important Change the verb form
are
device
despite all the negative aspects Fix the agreement mistake
devices
in
using Change preposition
of
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
a computer
computers
computers
.Submitted by teretryandbuy on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay structure appears logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, the flow between ideas could be improved by better linking words and more coherent development of ideas. Consider using more transition phrases and ensuring each paragraph flows logically to the next.
task achievement
You've responded to the task with a clear position and have attempted to support your arguments with examples. Yet, the examples provided are somewhat general and lack specificity. To strengthen your essay, aim to include more precise and relevant examples that directly support your viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
Additionally, focus on clarity and precision in expression. There are instances of grammatical errors and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'it could be argued that computers did not the most essentials technologies over a century') that could confuse readers. Take time to review basic grammar structures and practice rephrasing awkward sentences for clearer communication.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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