Water pollution has been an increasing problem over the last few decades. What are the causes and effects of water pollution?

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In today's world,
water
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pollution
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has been reaching an alarming level.
This
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essay will delve into the reasons behind
this
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global issue and its potential consequences. The major contributing factors are agricultural and domestic
pollution
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.
Firstly
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, in developing countries, the agricultural sector has a superiority over other sectors and increases day by day.
Therefore
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, chemical
waste
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, which is used in agriculture,
such
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as pesticides and fertilizers is discharged into rivers, river banks, and canals, which is dangerous for human consumption.
Secondly
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, the disposal of irresponsible
waste
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is another primary factor behind contaminated
water
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. Many individuals dump their domestic
waste
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,
such
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as bottles, cans, and heavy metals into groundwater.
It is clear that
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water
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pollution
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is responsible for detrimental impacts on the survival of both humans and animals. One of the threatening consequences is that dirty
water
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paves the way for people to be ill. To exemplify, many diseases,
such
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as cholera are spread by drinking
water
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and
this
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kind of illness puts citizens at risk.
Furthermore
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, it is inevitable that the contamination of
water
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will result in the death of aquatic animals.
For instance
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,
as a result
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of industrial and radioactive
waste
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, the amount of oxygen in the sea has been decreasing,
therefore
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, many marine animals, especially various kinds of fish have lost their life. In conclusion,
water
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pollution
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has been rising all over the world because of agricultural purposes,
as well as
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domestic garbage and
as a result
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of
this
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, many individuals suffer from a number of health problems.
Also
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, the fauna of marine life is in danger.

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Task Achievement
Expand your introduction by providing more background information on water pollution, its global significance, and possibly some introductory statistics. This will enrich your essay and demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Coherence & Cohesion
While your essay presents clear main points, enhancing it with a wider range of vocabulary and complex sentence structures could significantly improve coherence and cohesion. Avoid repetitiveness by using synonyms and varying sentence patterns.
Task Achievement
Incorporate a wider variety of specific examples and data to support your arguments. While the examples given are relevant, adding more detailed cases and possibly some statistics or studies could strengthen your essay's persuasiveness and relevance.
Task Achievement
The conclusion summarizes the essay's main points well, but consider adding a forward-looking statement or a suggestion for addressing the issue. This can provide a compelling close to your essay and demonstrate a deeper level of critical thinking.
Coherence & Cohesion
To further improve coherence, ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs themselves. Use linking words and phrases more effectively to guide the reader through your arguments seamlessly.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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