The table shows data about the average income for one person in dollars, across two different age groups: under 18 and over 60, as well as the percentage of the poor population in three states in the US, namely California, Utah, and Florida

The table shows data about the average income for one person in dollars, across two different age groups: under 18 and over 60, as well as the percentage of the poor population in three states in the US, namely California, Utah, and Florida
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The table shows data about the average
income
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for one
person
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in dollars, across two different age groups: under 18 and over 60,
as well as
Linking Words
the percentage of the poor
population
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in three
states
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in the US, namely
California
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,
Utah
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, and
Florida
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.
Overall
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, the highest average
income
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per
person
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is in
California
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and
Florida
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.
By contrast
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, the rate of the poor
population
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is the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
in
Utah
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. It is
also
Linking Words
clear that the percentage of hardworking
people
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, aged under 18, is
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
in
Utah
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among the three
states
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. Looking at the details, more young
people
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, aged under 18, work in
Utah
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(28%),
while
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the highest rate of
people
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who work in the age group over 60 is in
Florida
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(23%). Comparing
this
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percentage to the state of
California
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, the highest share of employed
people
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is 17% among those aged under 18,
while
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13% of employees continue working after their 60s. Turning to average
income
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per
person
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and the
population
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below the poverty line, the
states
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with the highest salaries are
California
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and
Florida
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, with $23,000 and $22,000 US dollars respectively. Despite the high
income
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in
California
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, the share of poor
people
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constitutes 16% of the
population
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, the highest among the three
states
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.
Although
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the salary is lower in
Utah
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, at $17,000 US dollars per
person
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, the proportion of the poor is
also
Linking Words
the lowest at 9%.
Submitted by Shaxnoza on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words income, person, population, states, california, utah, florida, people with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "data" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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