It is better for college students to live in schools than live at home with their parents. Do you agree or disagree?

It is sometimes believed that
students
who
study
college
or university should live in
school
than
Rephrase
rather than
show examples
live at home with their parents.
This
essay strongly agrees with
this
suggestion for several
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
. The first argument given to support my opinion is that
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
will live independently. To be more particular, participating in
dormitory
Add an article
a dormitory
the dormitory
show examples
at
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
or
college
can give
students
a chance to have
experience
Correct article usage
the experience
show examples
of
live
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living
show examples
independently and make their own
decision
Fix the agreement mistake
decisions
show examples
in every situation without their parents'
advices
Change the wording
advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
. It can be noted that
students
will have the opportunity to live in a completely new environment, which can be considered a miniature society,
therefore
, they can
aquire
Correct your spelling
acquire
many skills
such
as communication or leadership and gain more experience from their peers. Take Vietnam for an example, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
students
who reach 18 are able to make a living on their own.
For
this
reason, I believe that
students
should live in
school
when
study
Replace the word
studying
show examples
college
because it
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
them to try to live independently. Another point behind my belief is that
college
can lead
students
expand
Add the particle
to expand
show examples
their relationships.
This
is because when their peers live in
Correct article usage
the dormintory
show examples
dormintory
Correct your spelling
dormitory
, they will meet a lot of friends and expand their relationships to try to cultivate more knowledge for learning purposes.
Moreover
,
students
can share
their
Change the pronoun
the
show examples
problems they encounter with their roommates, which are difficult to talk with their parents.
This
will help them feel more relieved when do not have relatives around. In
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
day, lots of friendships
were
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
created in
college
or university and they
helped
Wrong verb form
help
show examples
each other a lot even after graduation.
Thereby
Rephrase
Therefore
show examples
,
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
at
school
when
Correct word choice
while
show examples
study
Replace the word
studying
show examples
college
is the best way for
students
to expand their relationships. In conclusion, I entirely agree that pupils who
study
college
should live in
school
given the aforementioned arguments.
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Argument Support
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Language Use
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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