With the rapid development of communication(technology, such as smartphones, tablets, and other mobile devices, some people think the disadvantages outweigh its advantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree？
Recently, the influence of the advancement of technological devices has become the focus of the society.
People
put an argument that these electronic gadgets bring the harm than good. I concur with the statement and I will examine the impact of flooding mobile tools.
Excessive information generated by instant communication devices is detrimental to public concentration. Fewer people
are immune to the addiction of social media. Take the children as an example, kids who are exposed to the virtual world earlier may be harmful to their concentration because of the excessive attention flash from the screen. It may further
affect their mental health which may result in Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. A similar threat is also
harmful to the students who need to be focused on their schooling. Teenagers are more likely to get distracted by social media, they may be addicted to scrolling through their social apps and they find it difficult to fully engage in the class or tutorial. Therefore
, it may affect their academic achievement adversely.
Overindulging in instant communication platforms jeopardizes face-to-face interpersonal relationships. People
are prone to chat with their acquaintances online rather than meeting physically which suggests that they lack the opportunities to have real-life social interaction. It increases the hazards of building interpersonal skills like people
may feel anxious and uncomfortable while
they are trying to build new bonds with others in reality. As time goes by, they may lean toward meeting new friends visually and becoming self-isolated in daily life. Therefore
, they may lose the capability of socializing physically.
I have admitted that the benefit of the speedy improvement of instant mobile devices is that they could be employed to interact without the limitation of geography. At the same time, people
find it easy access to so that shortens the time of communication. It is one of the effective ways to contact someone.
To sum up
, there are two distinct perspectives on the booming technological development, I contend the disadvantages fall behind overshadow its advantages.Submitted by vancy0119 on
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task achievement
Be sure to fully develop your main points with more specific examples and explanations. It's useful to delve deeper into one or two examples rather than briefly mentioning several. This approach will help demonstrate your understanding and analysis of the topic more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Strive for a logical flow of ideas throughout your essay. Each paragraph should seamlessly lead to the next. Consider using more varied and explicit transition words or phrases to guide the reader through your arguments.
introduction conclusion present
Use the introduction to clearly state your position on the issue and outline the main arguments you plan to discuss. In the conclusion, succinctly summarize your arguments and restate your stance, tying everything back to the topic question.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.