Some people think that one good way to promote world peace is through international sporting events, while others think that it is not. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sports
is great
thing to make Add an article
a great
friendship
with other Replace the word
friends
nation
where all Fix the agreement mistake
nations
people
come Correct article usage
the people
accross
to cheer their respective nations. Some folks Correct your spelling
across
thinks
that Change the verb form
think
sports
is
Change the verb form
are
best
way to promote Change the article
the best
peace
but others believe that there are different ways to promote the
Correct article usage
apply
peace
at international levels.
Firstly
, sports
teach people
to live with
Change preposition
in
peace
because due to
sportsmanship people
come close each
other and they just play or watch rather Change preposition
to each
to
due any politics. Change preposition
than
People
learn the way of etiquette
of sportsmanship when they play against their Add an article
the etiquette
enemey
country. Promoting on Correct your spelling
enemy
enemies
Correct article usage
an internaltial
internaltial
level makes Correct your spelling
international
strong
bond Add an article
a strong
with
two Change preposition
between
nation
where they become friends. Fix the agreement mistake
nations
For example
, more than 89 thousand people
attend
the cricket match between Wrong verb form
attended
Indian
and Pakistan in Australia in 2022. Both nations Correct your spelling
India
people
come accross
and after results Correct your spelling
across
people
hugged each other and they forget that they are friend or enemy which lead the peace
in world
.
Add an article
the world
On the other hand
, some folks takes
Change the verb form
take
the
advantage of Correct article usage
apply
this
and play dirty politics which lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
people
in wrong
direction and start to fight each other because on Change the article
the wrong
international
level they can promote easily any wrong slogans Add an article
an international
the international
on
Change preposition
in
opposite
country where Add an article
the opposite
people
can start fighting with each other which disturb the peace
of world
.
Add an article
the world
To conclude
, promoting sports
at world
level is Correct article usage
the world
good
thing to untie the Add an article
a good
people
and promoting harsh or wrong slogan
will lead Fix the agreement mistake
slogans
massive
war Change preposition
to massive
zone
.Fix the agreement mistake
zones
Submitted by ranjot59 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
To improve your task response, ensure that your essay fully addresses the prompt by presenting a clear position on the topic from the introduction through to the conclusion. Expand on your ideas more comprehensively by providing detailed examples and explanations that directly support your view. This approach helps in achieving complete and fully developed responses.
Coherence and Cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, work on the organization of your essay. Introduce clear paragraphs for each main idea with topic sentences that outline the focus of the paragraph. Use transitional phrases to link ideas and paragraphs smoothly, helping the reader follow your argument more easily. This will make your essay more logically structured and cohesive.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.