In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
It is undeniable that individuals prefer to buy their own
home
and it's very essential for them. Fix the agreement mistake
homes
This
is because homeownership gives them peace of mind for several reasons. In my view, buying home
brings Add an article
a home
sense
of joy and security for owners. Add an article
a sense
This
essay will examine that
why buying Correct word choice
apply
home
is more Add an article
a home
favorable
and what is the good point Change the spelling
favourable
in
Change preposition
of
this
purchase.
One of the reasons for importance
of having own Add an article
the importance
home
is that buying property
is like investment
. Add an article
an investment
In other words
, by paying mortgage
or Add an article
the mortgage
a mortgage
buy
Wrong verb form
buying
home
in cash, Correct article usage
a home
people
save their money. For example
, after several years, there is a chance that the value of their property
will increase a lot compared to the time which
they buy their Correct word choice
when
home
. This
is why owning a property
can make people
more wealthy. Furthermore
, those who are living in their apartments can make a renovation or change the fundamental design of their home
based on their own taste.
I believe people
who live in their own home
are significantly happier. Fix the agreement mistake
homes
This
is because instead
of paying rent which is make
owner richer, they not only by paying mortgage invest their money but Wrong verb form
makes
also
they can save money for more fun. In other words
, owners has
better ability to travel or join expensive activity. Change the verb form
have
for
instance, homeowners are able to spend much more time with their families and they do not need to be worried about their old age years.Capitalize word
For
As a result
of having more fun and quality time, people
are going to be happier and optimistic.
To sum up
, purchasing home
Correct article usage
a home
instead
of paying rent gives sense
of security and stability to with owners.Add an article
a sense
Although
there are
some minor Change the verb form
is
downside
Fix the agreement mistake
downsides
about
buying Change preposition
to
home
, I believe living Correct article usage
a home
in
own Change preposition
on
property
is more satisfying than paying rent.Submitted by rr
on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic that is developed logically. Currently, some paragraphs can benefit from more structured explanations and transitions.
coherence cohesion
In your introduction and conclusion, make sure to clearly state your main argument and summarise your main points more distinctly. This helps in emphasizing your stance.
task achievement
Support your points with more specific examples and evidence. While you mentioned the benefits of owning a home, including more detailed examples and statistics could strengthen your argument.
task achievement
To improve your score in task achievement, expand upon your analysis by considering both sides of the argument, even if you lean towards one perspective more. This demonstrates an ability to critically analyze the topic.
task achievement
Watch out for minor grammatical errors and work on varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement.
