Some people think that success in life comes trom hard work and determination, while others think hot there are more infortant factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Whether being successful in life is a result of determination and hard

work

Use synonyms

or other elements

contribute

Correct pronoun usage

that contribute

show examples

to wealth or appearance is a highly debatable question. The writer believes that some other crucial elements play a much more important role than just pure conscientiousness and perseverance. It is vital to understand that an insane

work

Use synonyms

ethic with an unwavering attitude is undoubtedly essential to being successful in life.

It is clear that

Linking Words

to enhance the potential for career advancement, individuals need to show a certain amount of diligence and resoluteness.

For example

Linking Words

, Kobe Bryant, one of the most successful basketball players of all time, is known for his insane

work

Use synonyms

ethic where he spent 8 hours per day to train and improve consistently for over 20 years.

Thus

Linking Words

proving that hard

work

Use synonyms

is a vital element to success.

However

Linking Words

, many components can play a key role in determining whether someone is successful or not. A well financial background can serve as a catalyst for propelling individuals forward, acting as a precursor to achieving greater milestones later in life.

Moreover

Linking Words

, a polished appearance can significantly influence how someone is perceived.

This

Linking Words

is how the Kardashian family is widely regarded as famous and influential because of their wealth and good looks.

Thus

Linking Words

, giving them the edge that can be important in someone’s career potential. In conclusion, there are more aspects that play a key role in someone's success than just pure determination.

Hence

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

essay has proved that there are other factors that contribute to success than just a strong

work

Use synonyms

ethic and passion.

[email protected]Tue Mar 26 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

It may be beneficial to further expand upon and balance the support for both views. The essay leans slightly towards one perspective and could give more substantial examples for both positions.

coherence cohesion

A smoother transition between paragraphs can enhance the flow of the essay. Using transition words or phrases can help create a stronger link between ideas.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which reinforces the main argument effectively.

task achievement

The examples provided, such as Kobe Bryant and the Kardashian family, are specific and relevant, adding depth to the discussion.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is solid, with a well-organized progression of ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people say it is more important to plant trees in the open spaces in towns and cities than to build more housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, many humans think that planting trees in open spaces in towns and cities is more important than building new and modern houses. The following essay takes a look at both sides of the argument. In my view, this is right and I will support this view with arguments in the following paragraphs.
5.5
band
Financial education should be included as a mandatory subject in schools to prepare students for managing money effectively. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In order to make youngsters able to control their micro-economy, lessons of financial literacy must be involved in schools' curriculums. I completely agree with this view on the grounds that by obtaining more information regarding economy, next generations would feel secured with their savings and can efortlessly evaluate financial opportunities.
6.5
band
You arranged to visit a friend in Australia, but an important event at home now means that you must change the dates of the visit. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter, explain the important event apologise for the situation suggest a new arrangement Write at least 150 words.
I writing this letter to inform you that, I am not coming on the scheduled date to visit you due to a vital function in my family, but instead of it, I will come in the first week of the next month.
6.5
band
In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do think some people might not be happy to give using cash.
As technology continues to advance, it is argued by many that cash transactions will soon become obsolete. However, others may not be satisfied by this development. I think that the cash payment will be a thing of the past in a short while since it ensures the customers security. Even though some folks would kick back at this, owing to the stress associated with rectifying a declined payment.
5
band
In some countries, people who commit less serious crimes are made to undertake community service* instead of a prison sentence. Some people believe that all people who have committed a crime should be sent to prison. Do you agree or disagree?
In a few nations, individual who commit less serious crime, like stealing or breaking any law, is made to undertake community service instead of a jail. While others think that all individuals who have committed a crime might be sent to jail. I am completely convinced with the first view because if a person steals something, it is a crime but he can not be counted in the category of criminal, however, to kill someone, or plan/do a big robbery is a big crime.

Some people think that success in life comes trom hard work and determination, while others think hot there are more infortant factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Some people say it is more important to plant trees in the open spaces in towns and cities than to build more housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Financial education should be included as a mandatory subject in schools to prepare students for managing money effectively. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You arranged to visit a friend in Australia, but an important event at home now means that you must change the dates of the visit. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter, explain the important event apologise for the situation suggest a new arrangement Write at least 150 words.

In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do think some people might not be happy to give using cash.

In some countries, people who commit less serious crimes are made to undertake community service* instead of a prison sentence. Some people believe that all people who have committed a crime should be sent to prison. Do you agree or disagree?