Some people think that success in life comes trom hard work and determination, while others think hot there are more infortant factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is argued that a successful life always goes with attempts and resolutions because it will make them feel satisfied with their life with huge money and power,
while
others believe that success
is just enjoying every little thing in their life.
When you work
hard with determination, your chances of success
increase exponentially. For example
, students who work
hard have higher chances of succeeding in competitive exams. Likewise
, in the field of science and technology hard work
and the never-say-die spirit are the main factors that help a person succeed. A scientist or a technocrat does not have to be handsome or beautiful to succeed. Likewise
, an entrepreneur, doctor or lawyer does not have to have attractive looks. So, obviously, in fields
like these hard work
and determination are definitely the key to success
.
However
, there are certain other fields
where good looks or wealth can help a person succeed. In show business, for example
, attractive looks play a huge role. Good looks are extremely important for someone who wants to be an actor or television show host. Money can also
help one buy success
. Rich kids often get to study in Ivy colleges even if they are not particularly brilliant. The connections they make there help them achieve greater success
in future. In addition
, they have capital to invest so success
comes to them more easily.
Even in fields
like medicine, law or business, attractive looks improve a hardworking person’s success
substantially. Clients may prefer a good-looking attorney to a plain-looking attorney. Good looks also
enhance a person’s self-confidence. They are not exactly afraid of rejection and this
confidence also
plays a crucial role in boosting their success
.
In conclusion, in some fields
, hard work
and determination are enough to achieve success
. However
, there are certain other fields
where looks matter more. That said, good looks or money alone will not suffice. Attractive and rich people also
have to try although
they have it a whole lot easier.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
To enhance your score in task achievement, ensure you thoroughly address all parts of the prompt by providing a balanced discussion of both views before clearly stating your own opinion. Integrate your opinion seamlessly into the discussion to make your stance unmistakable.
Coherence and Cohesion
In terms of coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider range of linking phrases and topic sentences to guide the reader more clearly through your argumentation. This will help in clarifying the relationship between ideas and improving the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure your introduction and conclusion are more distinct and effectively frame your essay. The introduction should clearly set out the topic and what your essay will discuss, while the conclusion should succinctly summarize your main points and restate your opinion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?