Some people think it is a better way to leave their own country to improve their work and living opportunities, while others think that staying in their own country is better choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is generally accepted that in the modern
period
Add a comma
period,
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
oversea
Fix the agreement mistake
overseas
show examples
trand
Correct your spelling
trade
has become more common in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. Many argue that moving
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
another countries
Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
show examples
will gain more benefits in many positions
such
as job
oppotunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
.
Whereas
some might prefer to stay in their own country because they think it is the most suitable place
of living
Change preposition
to live
show examples
.
This
essay will demonstrate both sides of opinion, and illustrate why working aboard will
definately
Correct your spelling
definitely
offer more chance of living to all workers
thoughout
Correct your spelling
throughout
the following paragraphs. On the one hand,
among
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the new generation of people
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
been discussing
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
why going
aboard
Rephrase
abroad
show examples
is a better choice. The worker will get
ba
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
better pay,
due to
the value of money
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
oversea
Correct your spelling
overseas
show examples
is
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
higher than
Thai
Correct article usage
the Thai
show examples
Baht.
For example
,
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
an employee in the UK can get 400 baht per hour in some jobs,
however
in
Thailand
, the workers will only get 400 Baht per day. Living in the
deverlop
Correct your spelling
developed
nations can provide a better quality of
life
,
such
as all the medicine
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
are free for everyone, but
this
rule is not available in
Thailand
.
On the other hand
, some individuals might think that staying in their home place is the best choice. In
Thailand
, everyone
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to work hard more than they have to do to gain as much as salaries, and the salary is quite lower because of the government rule.
Furthermore
, tuning to the quality of
life
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is not that good
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
with
another nations
Replace the adjective
another nation
other nations
show examples
, the government did not help with any expenditures or facilities
such
as transportation and medication. In conclusion, it cannot be denied that
oversea
Correct your spelling
overseas
show examples
could bring more
beneficial
Replace the word
benefits
show examples
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
life
quality than in
Thailand
because the leader of the country
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
the facilities
cost
Verb problem
apply
show examples
for their followers. As a suggestion,
Thai
Add an article
the Thai
show examples
government should care more about
residents
Change noun form
residents'
resident's
show examples
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Submitted by piasnatcha09 on

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Introduction & Conclusion
Ensure you have a clear introduction and conclusion that succinctly present your main argument and summarise your discussion effectively.
Supported Main Points
Develop your main points more fully with detailed examples and explanations to support your arguments better. Avoid general statements and aim to provide specific examples from real-life or studies.
Logical Structure
Enhance your essay's logical structure by clearly linking your ideas and paragraphs. Use a range of cohesive devices (linking words and phrases) to show the relationships between your ideas and to help guide the reader through your argument.
Complete Response
Make sure to address all parts of the task equally and provide a clear response to the essay prompt. Discuss both views as asked, and ensure you clearly state your own opinion in the conclusion.
Clear & Comprehensive Ideas
Strive for clarity in your writing by presenting comprehensive ideas. Use clear topic sentences to introduce the main idea of each paragraph, and avoid mixing ideas within paragraphs.
Relevant & Specific Examples
Incorporate relevant and specific examples to support your points. Use examples that directly relate to your arguments and help to illustrate your points more vividly.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emigrate
  • expatriate
  • cultural assimilation
  • economic prospects
  • nostalgia
  • sense of belonging
  • diaspora
  • uproot
  • global mobility
  • skilled migration
  • patriotism
  • brain drain
  • work-life balance
  • job market
  • cultural heritage
  • cost of living
  • standard of living
  • national identity
  • social support networks
  • professional development
  • multiculturalism
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