AMany museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

#amany #museums #charge #admission #people

It is generally accepted that art

gallery

Fix the agreement mistake

galleries

show examples

has

beome

Correct your spelling

become

more popular in the modern period. There are some people who argue that the entrance

fee

should be free,

whereas

some disagree with

this

opinion.

This

essay will demonstrate why the museum should continue charging the

fee

throughout the following paragraphs. On the one hand, visiting museums

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

now

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a popular trend among teenagers age, and there are some places that still offer people

a free tickets

Correct the article-noun agreement

free tickets

a free ticket

show examples

. The benefit

Change preposition

show examples

charging the admission

fee

is to support the artists,

due to

Change preposition

because

show examples

every

artpieces

Correct your spelling

art piece

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

from the person's creativities. The

professional

Fix the agreement mistake

professionals

show examples

have to spend a lot of their time on each model, and they have to work hard to improve their products.

Furthermore

, each item

have

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has

show examples

a lot of

process

Change to a plural noun

processes

show examples

before it

become

Change the verb form

becomes

show examples

a final

artpiece

Correct your spelling

art piece

. Another significant reason is to help with the

maintainance

Correct your spelling

maintenance

cost of the

gallary

Correct your spelling

gallery

. What is more, the place

provide

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provides

show examples

lots of facilities

such

hire

Wrong verb form

hiring

show examples

seculity

Correct your spelling

security

guards to look after the priceless objects.

Which

Correct pronoun usage

This

show examples

means the owner of

this

place

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

to spend more money on

this

duty. On the

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

hand, some argue that the price should be free.

According to

this

situation, will help attract more customers. The

traget

Correct your spelling

target

group of visitors will be larger

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if they do not have to pay.

Additionally

, people who might not have a lot of money will be able to have an opportunity to explore the

creativities

Replace the word

creativity

show examples

. In conclusion, the place that

contain

Change the verb form

contains

show examples

creativities objects should collect the charging

fee

because it could help to support the artists and

helping

Wrong verb form

help

show examples

with the

maintainance

Correct your spelling

maintenance

cost. As a suggestion, to attract more individuals, the price be more

effordtable

Correct your spelling

affordable

for every

generations

Change to a singular noun

generation

show examples

Submitted by piasnatcha09 on Tue Mar 26 2024

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task achievement

Ensure your essay introduction explicitly states your opinion on the issue, making a clear thesis statement. This improves task response by demonstrating a clear position.

coherence cohesion

To enhance the clarity of your ideas, use a wider range of linking phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs. Examples include 'As a result', 'In contrast', and 'Due to this'.

task achievement

Incorporate more specific examples and evidence to support your main points. This can take the form of citing specific museums, countries, or statistical data to make your argument more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Mistakes in these areas can detract from the credibility of your argument and make the essay harder to follow.

task achievement

To improve task achievement, discuss both sides of the argument in more depth. After presenting each side, critically analyse their strengths and weaknesses before making your conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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AMany museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many people argue that in order to improve the quality of education, high school students should be encouraged to make comments or even critism of their teachers. Others think it will lead to loss of respects and discipline in the classroom. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some experts believe that a second language should be taught at an early age. Do the advantages ouyweigh the disadvantages

In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing. What problems is this causing? What measures could be taken to counter this situation?

Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.