AMany museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?
It is generally accepted that art
gallery
has Fix the agreement mistake
galleries
beome
more popular in the modern period. There are some people who argue that the entrance Correct your spelling
become
fee
should be free, whereas
some disagree with this
opinion. This
essay will demonstrate why the museum should continue charging the fee
throughout the following paragraphs.
On the one hand, visiting museums are
now Correct subject-verb agreement
is
in
a popular trend among teenagers age, and there are some places that still offer people Change preposition
apply
a free tickets
. The benefit Correct the article-noun agreement
free tickets
a free ticket
by
charging the admission Change preposition
of
fee
is to support the artists, due to
every Change preposition
because
artpieces
Correct your spelling
art piece
are
from the person's creativities. The Correct subject-verb agreement
is
professional
have to spend a lot of their time on each model, and they have to work hard to improve their products. Fix the agreement mistake
professionals
Furthermore
, each item have
a lot of Change the verb form
has
process
before it Change to a plural noun
processes
become
a final Change the verb form
becomes
artpiece
. Another significant reason is to help with the Correct your spelling
art piece
maintainance
cost of the Correct your spelling
maintenance
gallary
. What is more, the place Correct your spelling
gallery
provide
lots of facilities Change the verb form
provides
such
as hire
Wrong verb form
hiring
seculity
guards to look after the priceless objects. Correct your spelling
security
Which
means the owner of Correct pronoun usage
This
this
place have
to spend more money on Change the verb form
has
this
duty.
On the another
hand, some argue that the price should be free. Correct quantifier usage
other
According to
this
situation, will help attract more customers. The traget
group of visitors will be largerCorrect your spelling
target
,
if they do not have to pay. Remove the comma
apply
Additionally
, people who might not have a lot of money will be able to have an opportunity to explore the creativities
.
In conclusion, the place that Replace the word
creativity
contain
creativities objects should collect the charging Change the verb form
contains
fee
because it could help to support the artists and helping
with the Wrong verb form
help
maintainance
cost. As a suggestion, to attract more individuals, the price be more Correct your spelling
maintenance
effordtable
for every Correct your spelling
affordable
generations
.Change to a singular noun
generation
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task achievement
Ensure your essay introduction explicitly states your opinion on the issue, making a clear thesis statement. This improves task response by demonstrating a clear position.
coherence cohesion
To enhance the clarity of your ideas, use a wider range of linking phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs. Examples include 'As a result', 'In contrast', and 'Due to this'.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples and evidence to support your main points. This can take the form of citing specific museums, countries, or statistical data to make your argument more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Mistakes in these areas can detract from the credibility of your argument and make the essay harder to follow.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, discuss both sides of the argument in more depth. After presenting each side, critically analyse their strengths and weaknesses before making your conclusion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example