AMany museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is generally accepted that art
gallery
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galleries
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has
beome
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become
more popular in the modern period. There are some people who argue that the entrance
fee
should be free,
whereas
some disagree with
this
opinion.
This
essay will demonstrate why the museum should continue charging the
fee
throughout the following paragraphs. On the one hand, visiting museums
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
now
in
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apply
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a popular trend among teenagers age, and there are some places that still offer people
a free tickets
Correct the article-noun agreement
free tickets
a free ticket
show examples
. The benefit
by
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of
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charging the admission
fee
is to support the artists,
due to
Change preposition
because
show examples
every
artpieces
Correct your spelling
art piece
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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from the person's creativities. The
professional
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professionals
show examples
have to spend a lot of their time on each model, and they have to work hard to improve their products.
Furthermore
, each item
have
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has
show examples
a lot of
process
Change to a plural noun
processes
show examples
before it
become
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becomes
show examples
a final
artpiece
Correct your spelling
art piece
. Another significant reason is to help with the
maintainance
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maintenance
cost of the
gallary
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gallery
. What is more, the place
provide
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provides
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lots of facilities
such
as
hire
Wrong verb form
hiring
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seculity
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security
guards to look after the priceless objects.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
means the owner of
this
place
have
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has
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to spend more money on
this
duty. On the
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
hand, some argue that the price should be free.
According to
this
situation, will help attract more customers. The
traget
Correct your spelling
target
group of visitors will be larger
,
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apply
show examples
if they do not have to pay.
Additionally
, people who might not have a lot of money will be able to have an opportunity to explore the
creativities
Replace the word
creativity
show examples
. In conclusion, the place that
contain
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contains
show examples
creativities objects should collect the charging
fee
because it could help to support the artists and
helping
Wrong verb form
help
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with the
maintainance
Correct your spelling
maintenance
cost. As a suggestion, to attract more individuals, the price be more
effordtable
Correct your spelling
affordable
for every
generations
Change to a singular noun
generation
show examples
.
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task achievement
Ensure your essay introduction explicitly states your opinion on the issue, making a clear thesis statement. This improves task response by demonstrating a clear position.
coherence cohesion
To enhance the clarity of your ideas, use a wider range of linking phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs. Examples include 'As a result', 'In contrast', and 'Due to this'.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples and evidence to support your main points. This can take the form of citing specific museums, countries, or statistical data to make your argument more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Mistakes in these areas can detract from the credibility of your argument and make the essay harder to follow.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, discuss both sides of the argument in more depth. After presenting each side, critically analyse their strengths and weaknesses before making your conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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