Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting a culture. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

#people #culture #tourism #revenue

There are multifaceted circumstances when discussing the balance of tourism and culture. Several, especially the people who have an economic background, agree that there must be a supportive relationship between the two targets.

On the other hand

, somebody else keeps their stereotype that the new commer could enter and demolish the natural culture from their location. With the respection from both aspects,

this

essay will give a detailed explanation, based on the writer's reality experience with the visual metrics. Economically, Tourism could create a huge revenue based on the

nation

's services or products that attract visitors during their journey.

This

is a two-way impact and can support each other to be more magnificent. To illustrate, Thailand is the top

nation

for traveling and their techniques to promote tours are the way the other countries need to learn.

As a result

, by using their strength as tourist efficiency, the other services industry has a big transformation after 2000, bringing

this

country to become the top fastest country in the ASEAN Group. Culturally, when travel was created only to satisfy foreigners, it could be hard for a

nation

to keep its original identity. Several visitors with various tastes and demands could ask the organizers or shop owners to adjust the products or services based on their

favors

Change the spelling

favours

show examples

. To illustrate, some dishes from the Northen of Vietnam require using shrimp paste as an indispensable sauce.

However

, its specific aroma could be a nightmare with people from other countries, especially from the West. By ignoring using

this

for the satisfaction of customers, Vietnamese shrimp paste could be a forgettable dive in history. In light of these facts, one can conclude that tourism is neither a pros nor cons to cultural preservation. The ministry of each country has the responsibility to develop the travel, in parallel with inspiration and promotion for the beauty in their

nation

's culture.

Submitted by hoagloc on Tue Mar 26 2024

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task achievement

To enhance your task achievement, ensure to fully address all parts of the prompt. While you have discussed both views, integrating a clearer, more distinct personal opinion could strengthen your argument. Make sure to clearly state your stance in both the introduction and conclusion for maximum impact.

coherence cohesion

Your essay shows good organization, but to improve coherence and cohesion, consider utilizing a wider range of cohesive devices beyond just 'to illustrate' to link ideas more smoothly. Also, work on ensuring a clear progression of ideas throughout paragraphs by starting each with a topic sentence that outlines the main idea you will discuss.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

312 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting a culture. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that the prevention of health problems is more important than the treatment of illness and disease and that Government funding should reflect this.What is your opinion?

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teachers should not make their social or political views known to students in the classroom. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.