IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of workig form home. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#workig #form #home
Working from
home
 has both some benefits and drawbacks. The advantages of
this
 working
type
 can be more significant than disadvantages for some kinds of jobs and less for others. The benefits of working from
home
 are really great and can give the freedom of action and time management.
Firstly
, working remotely is more convenient and comfortable for
employees
 themselves, which can help with
with
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
overworking issues. Workers have the ability to manage their working time
however
 they want, which can contribute to
employees
’ well-being, and
as a result
, improved work productivity.
Secondly
, working from
home
 is the best option for multinational companies and their
employees
. It gives these corporations an opportunity to hire even semi-professional or semi-retired
employees
 all around the world.
Finaly
Correct your spelling
Finally
, working remotely is the only
type
 of working for multitalented people who want to have enough time to combine different kinds of professions.
Nevertheless
, working from
home
also
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 some disadvantages. Sometimes,
employees
 can be underpaid
due to
 the perception of
this
type
 of
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
 as easier and less energy-intensive
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
Moreover
, employers have
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of control over their
employees
, because of working remotely, which can lead to
underachivement
Correct your spelling
underachievement
 of some work among
employees
.
Althoug
Correct your spelling
Although
,
classic
Correct article usage
the classic
show examples
type
 of
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
 is still
stay
Verb problem
apply
show examples
relevant, working from
home
 become more and more popular, which
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
 some problems,
shuch
Correct your spelling
such
 as understuffing for some companies. In conclusion, working from
home
 is really beneficial and an improvement in control over
employees
, it can completely and without serious losses replace
classic
Add an article
the classic
show examples
type
 of working for companies in some areas,
however
 not in every.
Submitted by vgaidar2505 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To enhance your task achievement score, try to incorporate a wider range of specific examples that are directly linked to your arguments. This will help to further illustrate your points and make your argument more convincing.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, consider varying your sentence structures more and ensuring smoother transitions between paragraphs. This can be achieved by using a range of linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion were clear, effectively framing your essay's focus.
Task Achievement
You provided a balanced view, discussing both advantages and disadvantages, which meets the task requirements effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: