In developing countries, children in rural communities have less access to education. Some people believe that the problem can be solved by providing more schools and teachers, while other think that the problem can be solved by providing computers and internet access. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Several individuals hold the vision that it is better to play team sports,
whereas
other human beings consider that a personal type of physical activity is valuable. In
this
essay, I will discuss both points of view and in the end, my individual position will be shown. On the one hand, solo motor activities are that some people believe have significant values. Obviously, when a human has to carry responsibilities for itself it is a more efficient way to reach success in a field like sport.
For instance
, athletes
such
as swimmers are not able to worry about others and there are no common aims with others.
Furthermore
,
there
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
may not come up with different positions, and
as a
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
they can bring off their purposes.
However
, they are by themselves and they will not be given any support, since solo athletes do not have a union.
Consequently
, athletes' excellent achievements are able to decrease.
On the other hand
, team sports may have numerous benefits, owing to the fact that when sportsmen face problems other members can share their advice and motivate each other.
Nevertheless
, being in the group may delay
relevance
Replace the word
relevant
show examples
results,
due to
there being lots of opinions that ought to be paid attention In my view, both of them can have their advantages, and at the same time disadvantages. Personal sports are more productive in the short term,
while
team physical activities are more valuable in the long term.
Submitted by sayazhorabek9466 on

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Introduction & Conclusion
Be sure to clearly introduce your essay topic and end with a concise conclusion summarizing your main points and opinion.
Use of Examples
Try to develop your examples further to make your arguments more persuasive. Specific examples can greatly enhance your points.
Paragraph Structure
Organize your essay into clear paragraphs, each centered around a single idea, to improve readability and coherence.
Sentence Variety
Work on varying your sentence structures to make your essay more engaging and to express your ideas more effectively.
Task Response
You discussed both views before stating your own opinion, fulfilling a key requirement of the task.
Understanding of Topic
You made an effort to compare and contrast different perspectives, showing an understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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