In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is the case? What can be done about this problem?

Starvation is always an emergent issue which still
could not
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cannot
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be solved despite
of
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apply
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the development of
equipments
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equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
in
agricultural
Add an article
the agricultural
an agricultural
show examples
field. In my perspective, there are two main reasons that
i
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I
show examples
will mention in
this
essay. First of all, poverty is one of the crucial reasons leading to
be hungry
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hunger
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.
This
is because of
a
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apply
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numerous
of
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apply
show examples
populations who lack
of
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apply
show examples
education, so
that
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apply
show examples
it is difficult
to
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for
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them to look for a job to have savings, and
then
they do not have
sufficent
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sufficient
money to afford their daily expense. These orders lead to the
repercussion
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repercussions
show examples
of famine even
we
Correct word choice
though we
show examples
are living in a modern society where the quantities of
food
are produced enough to supply
to
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apply
show examples
all over the world. We can tackle
this
problem
by
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in
show examples
many ways
such
as giving the group of people who are illiterate the chance to go to school, teaching them how to use the advances to cultivate, so they can manufacture
food
by themselves.
Besides
, we
also
need to consider
about
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apply
show examples
the phenomena of war which is
happened
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happening
show examples
in many parts of the world. Take the conflict between Russia and
Ukraina
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Ukraine
, millions of residents in both
the
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apply
show examples
countries lost their homes, their possesses. These citizens have to migrate, they
cannot
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can
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neither work nor have
food
to
remain
Verb problem
maintain
show examples
their
life
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lives
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. I read
a
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the
show examples
news on a website before, it was written that the
Russian
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Russians
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would supply
Ukrainian
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Ukrainians
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with
food
but they need to follow Russian soldiers. In my point of view,
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I
show examples
i
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I
show examples
think that the government should take
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apply
show examples
the
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apply
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responsibility
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for
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in
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for
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upgrading
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human
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human's
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human
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awareness of peace through social media, education and so on. To
summerize
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summarise
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, starvation is a challenge even recently when we innovated amount of advances which improve
human's
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human
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life
campared
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compared
to the past .
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even
,
we
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though we
show examples
still cannot erase it immediately,
i
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I
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believe that if one day people
in
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on
show examples
the whole earth cooperate, we will handle
this
issue
out
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apply
show examples
.
Submitted by trangtrnh548 on

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Task Achievement
To improve in task response, aim to fully answer all parts of the question with detailed explanations and relevant examples. While you've addressed the reasons for hunger and suggested solutions, further detail and deeper analysis could strengthen your essay. For instance, explore more thoroughly how technological advancements in agriculture could be better utilized or distributed to alleviate hunger.
Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider organizing your ideas more clearly and using a wider range of linking devices to connect your ideas and paragraphs. While your essay has a logical order, the transitions between ideas can be smoother. You might want to introduce each paragraph with a clear topic sentence that signals the main idea you will discuss.
Coherence and Cohesion
Check your essay for grammatical errors and aim to use a range of sentence structures and vocabulary accurately. Try to avoid repetitive language by using synonyms and varied sentence constructions. Consider revising the essay for spelling, punctuation, and verb tense consistency. Also, pay attention to the accuracy and formality of your language, avoiding colloquial expressions and maintaining a neutral, academic tone.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
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