The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what are the possible solutions?
One of the widely discussed
issue
nowadays is that the Internet has not just benefits but Change to a plural noun
issues
also
negative sides. The Linking Words
exist
problem is Internet fishing Change the verb form
existing
websites
with bad consequences and the most viable solution is Use synonyms
a
strict government supervision over suspicious Remove the article
apply
websites
and apps.
The principal problem Use synonyms
relating
to special Wrong verb form
relates
websites
which can lead to detrimental situations Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
in
Add an article
a persons
persons
life when their Change noun form
person's
money
might be taken away dishonestly. These sites are able to steal your personal data Use synonyms
such
as login, password or even to get access to your credit card Linking Words
throw
hacking. Resulting in losing Correct your spelling
through
money
, or inability Use synonyms
of having
Change preposition
to have
an
access to your personal pages on social networking. Remove the article
apply
For instance
, Linking Words
according to
the latest report by the Ministry of Internal Linking Words
affairs
over 58% of Capitalize word
Affairs
total
population used fishing sites once where they you can observe that someone withdrew their Add an article
the total
money
.
To tackle Use synonyms
this
problem the government should be involved in implementing strict measures to identify and block Linking Words
such
online threats. Linking Words
This
means some malicious online pages must be banned under government supervision as soon as special artificial intelligence software Linking Words
detected
any of them. Wrong verb form
detects
Also
, State representatives can create a list of Linking Words
such
swindling Linking Words
websites
to warn people. Use synonyms
For example
, Almost, every fifth person in Kazakhstan Linking Words
were
taken by Change the verb form
was
such
Linking Words
websites
and applications two years ago, Use synonyms
Linking Words
however
some promotional videos have been created to alert people and Add a comma
however,
such
cases Linking Words
has
declined Correct subject-verb agreement
have
considerable
since Change the adjective
considerably
then
.
In conclusion, in spite of Linking Words
brilliant
help of digital sources for Correct article usage
the brilliant
humans
there are Add a comma
humans,
also
several negative consequences as unknown and suspicious pages where citizens can be cheated for Linking Words
money
online. The solution is when officials take under control social Use synonyms
medias
which can cause negative Correct your spelling
media
Use synonyms
money matter
consequences.Add a hyphen
money-matter
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on
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Introduction Development
Clarify and expand your introduction for a more impactful beginning. Introduce your argument and outline the problems and solutions you will discuss to guide the reader.
Coherence and Linking
To enhance coherence, focus on connecting your ideas more clearly using transition phrases. Each paragraph should flow logically to the next, helping the reader follow your argumentation easily.
Cohesion and Structure
Enhance cohesion by using a wider range of linking devices and topic sentences that clearly state the main idea of each paragraph. This will strengthen the overall structure of your essay.
Task Response
To fully address the task, ensure that you cover all aspects of the question. While you've discussed problems and solutions, reflecting on the implications of these and considering counterarguments could provide a more rounded response.
Supporting Examples
Provide more detailed examples to support your points. While you've included one example, expanding on this with further detail or adding additional examples will strengthen your argument and make your essay more persuasive.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?