Some people think that children should study formal learning at school as young as possible. Others believe they should not go to school until they are at least 7. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

A number of individuals assumed that
kids
should start their
education
at
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
formal institutions
such
as school as young as possible.
Whereas
, others think that they should not enter
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
formal learning until 7 years old. I will discuss both views, I think entering
kids
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
formal
education
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
extremely good as long as they are ready to adapt
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
their new environment. One hand, starting formal
education
for
kids
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
early age will
provides
Wrong verb form
provide
show examples
new opportunities
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
fundamental
ability
Fix the agreement mistake
abilities
show examples
such
as reading and writing.
Furthermore
, it
also
can train
children
to recognise some important cognitive
development
,
for instance
, critical
thingking
Correct your spelling
thinking
,
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
show examples
and teamwork, which
probably
Add a missing verb
is probably
show examples
helpful in their future.
In addition
,
this
decision potentially gives more space for
children
to expand relations and social interactions with new people like teachers and peer
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
.
For example
, parents send their daughters or sons
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
kindergarten,
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
a result, their
kids
are more
easier
Correct word choice
likely
show examples
to adapt
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
social
Add an article
the social
a social
show examples
environment. On another hand, some people
stated
Wrong verb form
state
show examples
that
children
should be
regitered
Correct your spelling
registered
in formal
education
at
Change preposition
for at
show examples
least
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
7 years old because not all
children
have mature readiness.
Additionally
, entering school
require
Change the verb form
requires
show examples
several qualifications
such
as good emotional, cognitive and potential
development
.
Then
, emphasizing
to delay
Change the verb form
delaying
show examples
school entry
also
aims to give
play-base
Correct your spelling
play-based
show examples
learning in order to train their basic ability by stimulating
with
Correct pronoun usage
them with
show examples
some appealing activities. Another reason is to provide more time with family and parental involvement in
children
's
development
.
To conclude
, I think that sending
kids
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
formal
education
are good decision as long as they already mastered foundation skills and have adequate readiness
in particular
aspects like emotional and cognitive
development
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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task achievement
Your essay broadly addresses the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument and providing your opinion. However, including more specific examples to support your points could enhance your response. Consider integrating real-world instances or studies that highlight the benefits and drawbacks of early formal education.
coherence cohesion
Ensure clarity in your essay by paying close attention to the structure of your sentences and the organization of paragraphs. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea supported by examples or explanations. Transition words such as 'Furthermore', 'Additionally', and 'On another hand' help in linking ideas but strive for variety and precision in language.
coherence cohesion
While your essay demonstrates a logical structure, enhancing the link between ideas can further improve coherence. Use cohesive devices effectively, but don't over-rely on them. Aim for a balance between showing connections between ideas and allowing the argument's progression to naturally unfold.
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