Many university students nowadays live away from home and their parents because of their university location, while others live with their families. What are the advantages and disadvantages of each situation?
These days a lot of
students
in university migrate to study
at university, while
others prefer to study
in their hometown
. There are benefits and drawbacks to each situation that impact a student’s personality and lifestyle.
To begin
with, the benefit for individuals who are studying far away from their homes will be more independence. There are many challenges that students
have to face, such
as managing finances and taking care of themselves on their own. For instance
, many students
become good at housework after they leave their parents
’ house. In contrast
, many young people are adversely affected by bad lifestyles. The absence of parent’s rules makes individuals feel free to do anything. For example
, there are a lot of students
who study
in another city who fall into drugs.
On the other hand
, students
who study
in their hometown
and live with their families are more sheltered from negative influences. There are parental rules in their home and their family can control that student’s habits. For instance
, several parents
always control their child’s daily activities to make sure their child is safe from a bad lifestyle. However
, students
who live with their parents
mostly become not independent because they always rely on their parents
. There are many parents
who always take care of their child which makes their child not try to rely on themselves. For instance
, many students
are afraid to go anywhere because they are always accompanied by their parents
.
In conclusion, there are benefits and drawbacks between students
who study
in another city and in their hometown
. The students
who migrated to study
will have more independence than individuals who study
in their hometown
and live with their parents
. Afterwards, the student is more sheltered from negative influences when they live with their parents
than when they live alone because they study
far away from their homes.Submitted by writingieltsband9 on
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task response
Ensure your essay has a clear and direct answer to the question posed. While your essay discusses the advantages and disadvantages for both groups, making your stance or comparison clearer from the start could enhance the essay's focus.
coherence and cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. Terms such as 'furthermore', 'moreover', and 'consequently' can aid in creating a more cohesive text.
task response
While you provided general examples to support your points, incorporating more specific, detailed examples can provide a stronger backing to your arguments and help increase the relevance and impact of your examples.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...