Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The majority of
people
believe that working hard and determining are helpful to life, Use synonyms
while
others say that it is more significant issues like Linking Words
money
and physical Use synonyms
appearance
. Use synonyms
This
writer is of the opinion that the former choice is the option.
The reason why I agree with the former choice is that hard Linking Words
work
or determination can overcome arduous challenges. Use synonyms
This
is true because, Linking Words
people
who Use synonyms
work
determinedly can create motivation for Use synonyms
work
every day, thereby working in a comfortable and confident mood. Use synonyms
Consequently
, Linking Words
this
helps them be steadfast when facing difficult decisions and increases efficiency in Linking Words
work
so Use synonyms
success
in life will come. Use synonyms
For example
, all over the world Linking Words
has
many billionaires achieve Unnecessary verb
apply
success
because they have determination and Use synonyms
work
hard non-stop.
Another point worth considering is that having Use synonyms
money
and possessing a beautiful Use synonyms
appearance
can bring benefits for the future. The reason is that when Use synonyms
people
who have Use synonyms
money
or Use synonyms
appearance
can make a first impression on others, cooperate based on each other's interests. Use synonyms
As a result
, many beneficial conditions will be given and bring
wealth and Linking Words
success
in life. Use synonyms
Besides
, Linking Words
success
will easily collapse if Use synonyms
people
no longer have any useful value.
In conclusion, having Use synonyms
much
Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
money
and Use synonyms
appearance
has a variety of benefits Use synonyms
bacause
human can cooperate and help each other based on their conditions. Correct your spelling
because
Hence
, Linking Words
this
essay has clearly demonstrated that the right to support working determinedly is important.Linking Words
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task achievement
Focus on developing a clearer introduction and conclusion. Your opening should provide a brief overview of the differing views on the topic and introduce your stance. Your conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points and reiterate your viewpoint.
task achievement
Improve specificity and relevance of examples. While you mention billionaires' success due to hard work, providing a specific example with details would strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Clarify and expand upon your points. Certain sentences are confusing or lack detailed explanation. Clearer and more comprehensive development of your ideas will make your argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
Organize paragraphs logically and ensure a smooth flow of ideas. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and the sentences should connect logically to support that idea.
coherence cohesion
Use linking phrases more effectively to improve cohesion between sentences and paragraphs. This helps guide the reader through your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.