You are applying to get admitted to an educational programme at a university abroad. Specify what you want to study and write a motivation letter, including the following points- •What attracted you to this particular programme, reason for wanting to study- your motivations and ambitions •How your current study is relevant and what your academic achievements are •Why you are suitable- extracurricular activities, hobbies and other experience related to your choice of programme.

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Dear university, I am writing
this
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letter because I
am
Unnecessary verb
apply
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want to apply to
get
Verb problem
be
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admitted to an educational
programme
Use synonyms
. In the following, I am going to talk about what attracted me to
this
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particular
programme
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, my study and academic achievements , and those of them how to help me to study
this
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progamme
Correct your spelling
programme
and why
them
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they
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are suitable. First of all, the
programme
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can have a lot of actual
operation
Fix the agreement mistake
operations
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will go
to
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apply
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shool
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school
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to
have
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apply
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teaching and
teacher
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teachers
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will use a lot of
activit
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activity
activities
to teach the
knowlege
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knowledge
make
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and make
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children easy to know .
Also
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, I have s dream is I want to be a teacher in the future so I want to study
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this
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in this
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Use synonyms
programme
Correct your spelling
program
show examples
.
Submitted by asllchkied on

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structure
Your letter lacks a formal structure which typically includes an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Consider structuring your letter more clearly to enhance its coherence.
greeting and closing
You have not used a formal greeting or a closing statement, which are expected in a motivation letter for university admission. Use phrases like 'Dear Admissions Committee' and 'Sincerely yours,' followed by your name, to give your letter a professional tone.
paragraph structure
Each paragraph should focus on a single idea or point. Your letter blends several topics together, making it difficult to follow. Try to separate your motivations, academic achievements, and suitability into distinct paragraphs.
task completion
The response does not fully address the task. Details about the specific program you are applying for, how your studies are relevant, and specific academic achievements are missing. Make sure to clearly address all points mentioned in the task.
writing tone
The writing tone of your letter alternates and lacks the formality expected in an application letter. Use a consistent and formal tone throughout the letter to maintain professionalism.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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