the diagram below shows the floor plan of public library 20 years ago and how it looks now

the diagram below shows the floor plan of public library 20 years ago and how it looks now
The provided maps give information about the current Central
Capitalize word
Library
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library
Capitalize word
Library
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plan
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and
anh
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and
how it looked 20 years ago.
Overall
, it can be clearly seen that the major change is the
Replace the word
establishment
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establish
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establishment
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of the cafe and provided self-service machines.
In addition
,add
section
Add an article
a section
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
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storytelling
event
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events
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in the
library
. In the past days about 20 years ago,the
library
it was
contain
Wrong verb form
contained
show examples
Correct article usage
a reading
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reading
Correct article usage
a reading
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room
for reading
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newspapers
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newspaper
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newspapers
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and magazines
also
there was
Correct article usage
a specific
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specific
Correct article usage
a specific
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place
Change preposition
for
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of
Change preposition
for
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adult
Add an article
an adult
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non-fiction
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books
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book
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books
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.
Moreover
, in the centre of the
library
Add a comma
library,
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there were some tables and chairs.The
enqiury
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enquiry
desk which
is provide
Wrong verb form
provides
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services related to booking tickets and
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booking
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book
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booking
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returns was located
Change preposition
On
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In
Change preposition
On
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the right side after the entrance. Currently,there are many
Fix the agreement mistake
transformations
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transformation
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transformations
show examples
occured
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occurred
to the Central
library
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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inculding
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including
Correct article usage
the addition
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addition
Correct article usage
the addition
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of new facilities
such
as a cafe and lecture
room
.
Moreover
, add
Correct article usage
a section
show examples
section
Correct article usage
a section
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called
Correct article usage
the storytelling
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storytelling
Correct article usage
the storytelling
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room
that
Correct subject-verb agreement
contains
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contain
Correct subject-verb agreement
contains
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many
Fix the agreement mistake
sofas
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sofa
Fix the agreement mistake
sofas
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and new types of fiction books for
childrens
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children
and add
Correct article usage
a specific
show examples
specific
Correct article usage
a specific
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place for all reference books.
Next,
remove the adult non-fiction books and the
tabels
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tables
with chairs from the
center
Change the spelling
centre
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area
therefore
Wrong verb form
expanding
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expand
Wrong verb form
expanding
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the space of the
library
.Rename the enquiry desk to
Correct article usage
the information
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information
Correct article usage
the information
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desk where
are newly
Wrong verb form
new
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services
provided
Add a missing verb
are provided
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called self-service machines.
Finally
, placed the videos and computer games in a
room
called
Correct article usage
the computer
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computer
Correct article usage
the computer
show examples
room
.
Submitted by jumanh114 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words library, room with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "provided" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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