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Band 4

The number of international conferences in three cities. 1965-2010

#conferences #three #cities
The line graph highlights data about the
quantity
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number
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 of international
conferences
 in some particular cities between 1965 and 2010.
Overall
, it can be clearly seen that the number of international
conferences
 in
city
 A and
city
 B decreased significantly
while
city
 C witnessed
a
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apply
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growth throughout the period. Looking into detail, the figure for
city
 A and
city
 B started
with
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at
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 35 and about 31 respectively in 1965. In the following years, they underwent fluctuations. In 1975,
city
 A had 20 global
conferences
,
then
 it soared until 1985, reaching
at
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apply
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30.
At the end
 of the 45-year period, the number of international
conferences
 in
city
 A and
city
 B declined to 20 and 25 respectively. As for the remaining
city
, international
conferences
 were not observed in
city
 C in 1965.
However
, the figure jumped sharply to approximately 28 in 1995,
then
 decreased
just
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to just
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 under 25 in 2005. In
subsequent
Correct article usage
the subsequent
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 five years, the number of global
conferences
 reached 30.
Submitted by Name_1234 on

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Introduction and Overview Improvements
Provide a clearer overview in your introduction that highlights the main trends or significant changes for easier understanding.
Cohesion and Coherence Enhancements
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance coherence between sentences.
Detail and Accuracy Enhancement
Incorporate more specific data points (where possible) to strengthen your analysis and give more precise information.
Conclusion Enhancement
Try to conclude your essay with a short summary or final remark to wrap up your analysis effectively.
Effective Trend Analysis
Your essay effectively details the trends over the specified period, making it easy to understand the general movement of the data.
Comparative Language Use
You've made good use of comparative language to highlight differences between cities.
Clear Structure
Your structure is clear, with distinct sections for each city, which helps in following your analysis.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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