some people think that student in single-sex schools perform better academically. Others, however, believes that mixed schools provide children with better social skills for adults life. Discuss both of these views and give your opinion.

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Nowadays, the debate over
whatever
Correct word choice
whether
show examples
youngsters in single-sex
schools
indicate more academically desirable consequences or
students
Correct word choice
whether students
show examples
in mixed
schools
are equipped with better social skills for their future has become the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
of discussion.
This
essay will shed light on both points of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
and reveal my personal perspective. Advocates of single-sex
schools
claim that these
schools
have
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
pleasing contribution to children and successful outcomes. More precisely, juveniles are susceptible to undergo dire conditions
such
as
humilation
Correct your spelling
humiliation
,
bullying
Correct word choice
and bullying
show examples
.
Due to
the fact that
such
schools
are encompassed just girls or boys,
this
condition can assist school
organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
show examples
to diminish adverse implications of
this
tendency.
Secondly
,
according to
scientific research, when
same
Add a hyphen
same-gender
show examples
gender
individuals
endeavor
Change the spelling
endeavour
show examples
to contemplate collectively about
predicament
Add an article
the predicament
show examples
. They will more conveniently reach
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
with the help of sensible and same approach.
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
it is noteworthy to mention that minors feel more relaxed without impacting unpleasant behaviors of
opposite
Add an article
the opposite
show examples
gender
. In spite of numerous thoughts,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
, like many others, believe that combining each
gender
in
schools
will inevitably pave the way for positive consequences.
Firstly
, children will straightforwardly accustom to
communicate
Wrong verb form
communicating
show examples
with everybody at school, leading to
exchange
Correct article usage
the exchange
show examples
of knowledge and sharing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information with each other. Statistics
indicates
Correct subject-verb agreement
indicate
show examples
that each
gender
has its personal point of view. Taking advantage of different thoughts in
schools
will undeniably bring about optimal acquisition of various cognitions.
Secondly
, mixed
schools
assist
to express
Change preposition
in expressing
show examples
themselves for painfully shy people. Taking
everthing
Correct your spelling
everything
into consideration, despite the fact that
schools
with sole
gender
can induce superior graded outcomes,
schools
with both genders can prepare children
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
tough future
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
.
Submitted by bhoswriting on

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General
Ensure clarity in your argument by avoiding complex structures that might confuse the reader. Simplify your sentences for greater impact.
General
Be mindful of grammatical and spelling errors, as they can slightly impact the reader's understanding. Regular practice and proofreading can help minimize these errors.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more real-life examples or evidence to support your points. This strengthens your argument and makes it more persuasive.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on your essay's flow by using linking words and phrases to better connect your ideas. This will make your argument more coherent.
Task Achievement
You have effectively covered both views asked in the question along with providing your own opinion, which shows a good understanding of the task.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay shows a strong ability to structure arguments logically, making it easier for the reader to follow your line of reasoning.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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