Write about the following topic: The internet has changed the way we communicate. Much communication today happens through social media. Some people support this and think it is a positive development. Others believe that social media have negative effects. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays, Technology and
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
developed rapidly to change the way we communicate. Most of the communication occurs through social
media
these days. Some
people
think
this
is a positive
development
and support
this
information
while
others think that social
media
have many unpositive
effects
. I think both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ideas are true,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will write the essay based on my own experiences to prove my opinion. On the
on
Correct your spelling
one
show examples
hand,
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
changed many things in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. The most important change is how we communicate. After technology and
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
developed, we became able to communicate from distances with faces, before the
internet
developed or even invented, we were just able to talk from distances without showing faces.
This
development
is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
one of the most conventional
use
Change to a plural noun
uses
show examples
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
.
For example
, My brother lives with his family in
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
country and cannot
showup
Correct your spelling
show up
show examples
in the native country and cannot meet with us throughout the years even
holidays
Change preposition
on holidays
show examples
due to
his job
requirement
Fix the agreement mistake
requirements
show examples
. So
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
holidays, we video call them and celebrate holidays with
him
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
, even though they are not there it just feels like they are with us.
This
development
helped so many other
people
who
cannot
Wrong verb form
could not
show examples
meet their families.
On the other hand
, There are negative
effects
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
development
too.
For example
,
There
Fix capitalization
there
show examples
are many tricksters
through out
Correct your spelling
throughout
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
and using
face showing
Add a hyphen
face-showing
show examples
apps like Omegle to trick
people
to get
Change preposition
into getting
show examples
money from them. I was tricked when
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
was 12
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and gave them my all social
media
accounts
Correct subject-verb agreement
account
show examples
passawords
Correct your spelling
passwords
and names without thought, but after
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
they used my accounts to get money from
people
. Giving my accounts was the most dangerous decision in my life. In conclusion,
This
development
has positive and negative
effects
. Individuals need to find the right balance to use
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 and get the most benefits. The most simple and knowledgeable advice is
, do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
not
trust
Fix the infinitive
to trust
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unknown
people
and if they ask for 
password
Add an article
a password
the password
show examples
or anything just skip them. In my view, using the
internet
to play games or call
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
family members is the best way to use
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
without facing negative
effects
.
Submitted by buyabuya201 on

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Language Use
Try to use a range of sentence structures and vocabulary to express your ideas more clearly and accurately.
Language Use
Avoid using slang or informal expressions such as 'tricksters' and 'face showing apps' which may not be clear to all readers.
Language Use
Be cautious with grammar and spelling errors. Proofreading can help improve the clarity and professionalism of your writing.
Structure
Organize your essay more effectively by introducing clearer paragraph divisions. Each paragraph should represent a distinct idea or aspect of your argument.
Content
Consider providing a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument before presenting your opinion. This approach can enhance the persuasiveness of your essay.
Structure
Provide a brief introduction and conclusion that summarize your main points and restate your position for a stronger impact.
Content
You provided specific examples from personal experience, which adds a level of depth and interest to your argument.
Content
You clearly expressed your opinion, which is a critical aspect of the task.
Content
Your essay touched on both sides of the argument, showing an understanding that the issue is multi-faceted.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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