IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

More and more people are eating healthy food and exercising regularly. What are the reasons for that? What can we do to make other people do the same?

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Nowadays, there are a
lot
Use synonyms
 of bloggers and influencers, who promote healthy
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
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.
This
Linking Words
 includes not only
nutricion
Correct your spelling
nutrition
 habits
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 but
also
Linking Words
 doing workouts on a regular basis. Without a doubt,
this
Linking Words
 is a great tendency, but is there something that we can do to involve more people
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 that? Let's discuss it. To start with, we can all agree, that being healthy has become
a
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apply
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mainstream recently.
Personally
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Personally,
show examples
 I see a
lot
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 of my friends jogging, doing yoga, cross-fit, or just visiting
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
 classes and most of them share it with their followers on
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social media.
This
Linking Words
 often encourages others to try it and,
as a result
Linking Words
, join them too.
Moreover
Linking Words
, since 2020 a
lot
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 of companies
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 switched to remote work and when you spend most of your day at the desk next to the computer, you need some time to "shake your bones" or, at least,
streach
Correct your spelling
stretch
 your back. That's how I started visiting pilates classes, which was the best decision ever made.
Unfortunatelly
Correct your spelling
Unfortunately
, there are still a
lot
Use synonyms
 of people who avoid doing sports, even short exercises in the morning, so we need to find ways how to engage them. There is a different approach to everybody and, of course, there is no universal solution, but here are some things to try. Ask your relatives and friends to join you on a bike ride, take them on the evening walk to the park, invite them to your yoga class or, as an option, start a
one month
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one-month
show examples
 challenge with them. To
summaize
Correct your spelling
summarize
, we need to promote
healthy
Add an article
a healthy
show examples
 lifestyle, and the best thing to do
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is by showing your own example. The more people around you are healthy, the happier you will be.

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples to support your points, particularly in the body paragraphs. This can enhance clarity and relevance.
coherence cohesion
Work on sentence structure and grammar to avoid minor inaccuracies, as they can distract from the overall message.
task achievement
You have a clear introduction with a strong thesis statement, which sets the context for the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your writing style is engaging, and the use of personal experience makes your argument relatable to readers.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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