The old generation often hold traditional ideas about the correct way of life, thinking and behavior. However, some people think that these ideas are not helpful for young people to prepare for modern life. To what extent do agree or disagree?

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The elderly population considers traditional beliefs as the right way of living life in all aspects.

However

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, others said that these thoughts are not adequate for

this

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new generation to adapt themselves to the newly developed world. I generally believe that a mix of new experiences and advice from our grandparents could make us more successful. On one hand, the older population has experienced massive methods, and they have a thoughtful mind so it is convenient to utilize their experience and decide in the way that they have recommended.

For example

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, during negotiations, it is very challenging to cover all possible happens, and for a person who has little knowledge is demanding competition so in

this

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situation it is very positive to use an experienced negotiator and tackle all difficulties without making a mistake.

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, most of the big companies use their narrator aged between 50 to 60 because they are calm and aware of needs and responsibilities.

On the other hand

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this

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developing world that reforming day by day has created a number of obstacles that have never been

excited

Wrong verb form

exciting

show examples

before.

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as the computer.

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, fields that are new is essential to solve them with an open-mind view because no one has experienced them before. For illustration, the problems that occur in websites or media areas are new and need new knowledge and skills so having an innovative view can help more. In conclusion, utilizing our grandparenthood knowledge in a complete way is an outdated method

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just relying on the new generation is a risky movement. I think the blend of these two methods will be a massive success because in

this

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world we are struggling with known and unknown challenges daily, so a balanced mix of these two views leads us to happier life.

soroushnorouzi0478Tue Apr 02 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure clarity in your arguments by using varied sentence structures without sacrificing simplicity for complexity unnecessarily.

Coherence and Cohesion

Try to avoid repetition of ideas or phrases to strengthen the overall coherence.

Task Achievement

Enhance your arguments by incorporating more specific examples that directly support your points.

Task Achievement

While presenting a balanced view, ensure your personal stance is clear throughout the essay to meet the task response criteria effectively.

Introduction and Conclusion

You managed to introduce and conclude your topic well, effectively framing your arguments.

Logical Structure

Your essay provides a logical structure, making it easier for the reader to follow your argument.

Use of Examples

The inclusion of examples, though they could be more specific, helped to illustrate your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

301 words

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The old generation often hold traditional ideas about the correct way of life, thinking and behavior. However, some people think that these ideas are not helpful for young people to prepare for modern life. To what extent do agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Some people believe t hat violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence in people’s behavior. What is your opinion?

Is some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health, others believe that government should make sure that their are healthy.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In their advertising business nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?