in order to succeed, people require certain personality traits. what are these traits? what else is needed to succeed?

There are a couple of fundamental characteristics which lead
people
to
finding
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find
show examples
success
in
life
which can be noted as
responsibilty
Correct your spelling
responsibility
along
with
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apply
show examples
determination.
However
,
success
also
requires a fair share of
luck
combined with some social networking. In terms of personality, if
one
is both responsible and
ambitous
Correct your spelling
ambitious
,
thay
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they
should be
albe
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able
to reach triumph in
life
.
In other words
, a person who can manage themselves in
life
is often the same
one
who finds themselves in a position where
success
is around the corner
due to
how they present themselves in their affairs. Being determined,
on the other hand
, is a passive skill which guides
people
towards their goals.
This
trait is
one
whih
Correct your spelling
that
can be found in any successful individual, from Bill Gates to Elon Musk;
people
who have set their goals on a certain task,
accommplished
Correct your spelling
accomplished
accomplish
it and now their lives are in the history books. To be successful,
one
cannot rely solely on their character,
buts
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but
show examples
also
on
life
’s unfathomable
luck
and
people
they interact with. As for
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
luck
, a lot of
success
stories have a similar factor, simply being a the
right
place at the
right
time.
This
can be seen in a lot of movies, where the stories only make sense
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
one
small piece of
luck
enables the main character to find their dream.
Additionally
, the
people
you
kno
Correct your spelling
know
can
also
influence greatly on where your
life
ends up. To illustrate, by knowing the
right
person,
befriending
Correct word choice
and befriending
show examples
them,
one
could gain a position in a company based on friendship alone, not necessarily requiring any skills
besides
their own
socail
Correct your spelling
social
ones. In conclusion, in order to find
success
,
one
needs to take charge of their
life
’s path, by not just waiting for lucky opportune moments, but
also
getting to know the
right
people
in
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on
show examples
their desired road to
success
. If
one
desires
success
,
one
must navigate
this
world with a clear goal.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

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Grammar & Spelling
Ensure to proofread your work to correct minor spelling and grammar errors to enhance clarity. For example, 'responsibilty' should be 'responsibility', 'ambitous' should be 'ambitious', 'thay' should be 'they', 'whih' should be 'which', and 'buts also' should be 'but also'.
Coherence
To further improve coherence, try to make smoother transitions between paragraphs and within them. Use transitional phrases to better link ideas.
Detail & Examples
Expand on your examples by providing more concrete, real-life scenarios or historical examples to strengthen your arguments.
Content Nuance
Be cautious with overgeneralizations, especially when discussing success in relation to luck and social connections. While these points are valid, acknowledging variation in individual success stories can provide a more nuanced argument.
Structure
Effective use of introductory and concluding paragraphs to present and summarize the essay's main ideas.
Content Depth
You effectively brought out the importance of responsibility and determination as key personality traits for success.
Content Breadth
Good job incorporating elements outside of personal traits (luck, social networking) to discuss success, providing a comprehensive perspective.
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