It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Risk
is part and parcel of our life
.Taking risks in a good way always help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
people
to be successful in lives
Correct pronoun usage
their lives
as well as
in their career
growth.In this
essay,I will discuss both pros
and cons and in my opinion,I believe that Correct article usage
the pros
pros
of taking Correct article usage
the pros
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
has
the upper hand Change the verb form
have
than
cons.
On the one hand,Change preposition
over than
risk
can reduce the
fear,which can help Correct article usage
apply
people
to get back their confidence.Everytime
we can see that Replace the word
Every time
risk taking
individuals are passionate about their work,which can help them not only to minimize the Add a hyphen
risk-taking
risk
ratio but also
help them to maximize the reward ratio.In addition
,risk
takers study hard to indentify
the risky problem and make proper Correct your spelling
identify
plan
to solve the problem.By doing Fix the agreement mistake
plans
this
they can improve their personal life
as well as
make a health
Replace the word
healthy
up trend
graph for their Add a hyphen
up-trend
career
growth.For instance
,we all know that share
market is a risky place but if Correct article usage
the share
people
study hard and understand the share market very well they can eran
Correct your spelling
earn
lot
of money,which can help them to make better Correct article usage
a lot
life
as well as
better
Correct article usage
a better
career
.
On the other hand
,taking risk
is not a good option for all Fix the agreement mistake
risks
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
.Risk
can bring depression,frustartion
and Correct your spelling
frustration
also
mental problem
.After taking Fix the agreement mistake
problems
risk
, if Fix the agreement mistake
risks
people
can not get success in their life
they can be frustrated.In addition
,losing money can create economical
problems Replace the word
economic
to
the family.Change preposition
for
Additionally
,people
may be humiliated by family members and also
can lose respect form
Correct your spelling
from
the
society.Correct article usage
apply
For example
,if people
do not understand the share market properly but still try to earn money by trading randomly,not only they can lose their total invesment
but Correct your spelling
investment
also
they can lose faith from
others.
In conclusion,taking Change preposition
in
risk
with Fix the agreement mistake
risks
a
good planning should bring success to Remove the article
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
's personal and work life
but Fix the agreement mistake
lives
random
Correct article usage
a random
risk taking
mentality can destroy Add a hyphen
risk-taking
peoples
Change noun form
people's
career
.Fix the agreement mistake
careers
Submitted by mokaddamul on
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Language Use
Consider varying your sentence structure and vocabulary to enhance the sophistication of your essay. Using a range of sentence structures and employing more complex vocabulary can make your arguments more compelling.
Accuracy
Ensure your essay is carefully proofread to catch any typing errors, such as missing spaces and misspelled words ('earn' instead of 'earn', 'frustration' instead of 'frustartion'). Such small inaccuracies can slightly distract from your overall message.
Development
While your essay provides a clear position and adequately supports your arguments with examples, offering further depth and detail in your examples could strengthen your essay. Consider adding more specific instances or elaborating on the outcomes and impacts of the examples provided to make your points more persuasive.
Structure
You have done an excellent job of structuring your essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs discussing both sides of the argument, and a conclusion. This structure helps readers follow your line of reasoning.
Balance
Your ability to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks is commendable. You provided clear and balanced viewpoints, making your argument comprehensive and well-rounded.
Examples
Utilizing real-world examples, such as the share market scenario, effectively illustrates your points and makes your argument more relatable and understandable.
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