It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Risk
is part and parcel of our
life
.Taking risks in a good way always
help
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helps
show examples
people
to be successful in
lives
Correct pronoun usage
their lives
show examples
as well as
in their
career
growth.In
this
essay,I will discuss both
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
and cons and in my opinion,I believe that
pros
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the pros
show examples
of taking
risk
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risks
show examples
has
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have
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the upper hand
than
Change preposition
over than
show examples
cons. On the one hand,
risk
can reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fear,which can help
people
to get back their confidence.
Everytime
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Every time
show examples
we can see that
risk taking
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risk-taking
show examples
individuals are passionate about their work,which can help them not only to minimize the
risk
ratio but
also
help them to maximize the reward ratio.
In addition
,
risk
takers study hard to
indentify
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identify
the risky problem and make proper
plan
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plans
show examples
to solve the problem.By doing
this
they can improve their personal
life
as well as
make a
health
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healthy
show examples
up trend
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up-trend
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graph for their
career
growth.
For instance
,we all know that
share
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the share
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market is a risky place but if
people
study hard and understand the share market very well they can
eran
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earn
lot
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a lot
show examples
of money,which can help them to make better
life
as well as
better
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a better
show examples
career
.
On the other hand
,taking
risk
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risks
show examples
is not a good option for all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
.
Risk
can bring depression,
frustartion
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frustration
and
also
mental
problem
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problems
show examples
.After taking
risk
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risks
show examples
, if
people
can not get success in their
life
they can be frustrated.
In addition
,losing money can create
economical
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economic
show examples
problems
to
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for
show examples
the family.
Additionally
,
people
may be humiliated by family members and
also
can lose respect
form
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from
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
For example
,if
people
do not understand the share market properly but still try to earn money by trading randomly,not only they can lose their total
invesment
Correct your spelling
investment
but
also
they can lose faith
from
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in
show examples
others. In conclusion,taking
risk
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risks
show examples
with
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good planning should bring success to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
's personal and work
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
but
random
Correct article usage
a random
show examples
risk taking
Add a hyphen
risk-taking
show examples
mentality can destroy
peoples
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people's
show examples
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
.
Submitted by mokaddamul on

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Language Use
Consider varying your sentence structure and vocabulary to enhance the sophistication of your essay. Using a range of sentence structures and employing more complex vocabulary can make your arguments more compelling.
Accuracy
Ensure your essay is carefully proofread to catch any typing errors, such as missing spaces and misspelled words ('earn' instead of 'earn', 'frustration' instead of 'frustartion'). Such small inaccuracies can slightly distract from your overall message.
Development
While your essay provides a clear position and adequately supports your arguments with examples, offering further depth and detail in your examples could strengthen your essay. Consider adding more specific instances or elaborating on the outcomes and impacts of the examples provided to make your points more persuasive.
Structure
You have done an excellent job of structuring your essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs discussing both sides of the argument, and a conclusion. This structure helps readers follow your line of reasoning.
Balance
Your ability to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks is commendable. You provided clear and balanced viewpoints, making your argument comprehensive and well-rounded.
Examples
Utilizing real-world examples, such as the share market scenario, effectively illustrates your points and makes your argument more relatable and understandable.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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