An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situations?

An increasing amount of
people
who are the best
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at
show examples
on
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at
show examples
their jobs,
such
as doctors and tutors, are leaving their own poorer
countries
to work on the developed continent. In my opinion, it is not good. Because the
economy
of poorer
countries
can be decreased. And
that is
why,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
have to raise
up
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apply
show examples
salaries for
professionals
to solve
this
problem. Moving
professionals
from their own
country
to another developing
country
can have
bad
Add an article
a bad
show examples
effect on the
economy
of their poorer
countries
. By "
professionals
" I mean doctors and teachers. If
their
Change the pronoun
they
show examples
leave the
country
,
people
in the
country
can lose the opportunity to have the best
eduation
Correct your spelling
education
and the best treatment for ill residents.
In
Change preposition
As
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
result, there will be more
non educational
Add a hyphen
non-educational
show examples
people
, and medicine will not be developed. And the end,
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
will be one step closer to a deteriorating
economy
.
For example
,
according to
the scientists
in
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at
show examples
Oxford University, 65%
professionals
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of professionals
show examples
who
leaved
Correct your spelling
leave
show examples
their
country
are helping to improve another
country
's
economy
by working for them rather, than their own . But, despite all
this
Change the determiner
these
show examples
problems,
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
issues can be solved by raising
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
salaries.
People
will not think about leaving the
country
, if there
was
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
all
comforts
Correct article usage
the comforts
show examples
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of
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
the job, like
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
salary. The
economy
can be increased, if there
will be
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
more
people
who are pro at their job, and who
ready
Add a missing verb
are ready
show examples
to develop their own
country
.
For instance
,
Netherlands
Correct article usage
the Netherlands
show examples
has increased the salary for citizens, and
this
can help them to improve the
country
's
economy
because they have
professionals
in their
country
.
To sum up
, leaving
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
professionals
,
such
as doctors and teachers,
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
own poorer
countries
to work in developed
countries
can
led
Change the verb form
lead
be led
show examples
to
degradation
Correct article usage
the degradation
show examples
of the
country
.
However
, it can be solved by enhancing the salary.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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Coherence and Cohesion
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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

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  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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