Some people think that current environment issues are global problems and should therefore be dealt with by the government, while others believe that these problems can only be tackled by individuals. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Environmental concerns have affected
worlwide
leading Correct your spelling
worldwide
serious
outputs Change preposition
to serious
such
as global warming, massive destruction of the atmosphere, etc. Although
many solutions have been proposed, many people argue that these should be executed by governments, while
many other suggests that both counterparts should apply some techniques in order to decelerate the rate of environmental destruction.
To start with, it is well-known that big companies, industries, or factories, have the highest production of pollution annualy
. Correct your spelling
annually
Then
, some laws have to set
up to establish control and change Add a missing verb
be set
resources
that are used by them. Correct article usage
the resources
For instance
, McDonalds
, Nestle, or Cocacola must be under regulations in which they have to use Change noun form
Mcdonald's
Mcdonalds'
renovable
energies by reducing the usage Correct your spelling
renewable
removable
lower
quantities of fuel or coal. Change preposition
of lower
Besides
, deforestation and harvesting trees
must be controlled owing to Change preposition
of trees
millions
Add the preposition
millions of
kilometers
of forests Change the spelling
kilometres
have
been burnt, especially between Colombia and Brazil in a specific location called "Amazonia".
Correct pronoun usage
that have
Besides
, individuals should be educated in order to be aware of environmental issues as well as
ways to reduce the damage. For instance
, in Colombia, children learn how to recycle and sort residues, also
some campaigns and advertisements are shown around the city by showing the best tools to be implement
every day, Change the verb form
implement
such
as taking shorter showers, use recycle paper and implement
Wrong verb form
implementing
tecniques
like solar energy Correct your spelling
techniques
amoung
local communities.
Correct your spelling
among
To sum up
, environmental conscious
Replace the word
consciousness
are
not only for the governments, but Change the verb form
is
also
for the population, and everyone should deploy their best processes to conservate
the environment as Correct your spelling
conserve
natural
as possible.Change the word
naturally
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Language Use
Consider varying your sentence structure more to demonstrate a wider range of linguistic proficiency.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on more clearly defining your paragraphs with topic sentences that summarize the main idea of each paragraph.
Task Achievement
Further develop your conclusion by summarizing both views and more clearly stating your own opinion.
Content
You've provided a well-balanced discussion of both sides of the argument.
Content
You've effectively used examples to support your points.
Understanding
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?