As countries develop, their populations tend to live individually or in small family units. What are the causes of this trend and what are the effects on society?
Along with
the development of a country, Linking Words
people
tend to choose small Use synonyms
unit
of a family in terms of staying in Fix the agreement mistake
units
single
or unclear family. I believe that the limited living Correct article usage
a single
space
and the living Use synonyms
cost
are the major reasons, and it Use synonyms
also
brings benefits and drawbacks.
Regarding the Linking Words
trend
of staying single or unclear family, I believe the limited living Use synonyms
space
has a straightforward impact. Use synonyms
Due to
the development of a country, the population will increase relatively. Linking Words
However
, to Linking Words
raising
the level of life comfort under the condition of limited living Change the form of the verb
raise
space
Use synonyms
in particular
, Linking Words
people
will tend to choose Use synonyms
staying
in Change the verb form
to stay
single
or nuclear family. Add an article
a single
the single
Moreover
, living costs Linking Words
raising is
Verb problem
are
a
undeniable Change the article
an
trend
as a country Use synonyms
develop
. Once the living Correct subject-verb agreement
develops
cost
is raised, the economy will become the primary issue for a person because Use synonyms
extend
family has Change the form of the verb
extended
much
higher Correct article usage
a much
cost
. Use synonyms
As a result
, Linking Words
people
will choose Use synonyms
living
Wrong verb form
to live with
individual
or Correct article usage
an individual
nuclear
family in order to afford Correct article usage
a nuclear
the
lifeCorrect article usage
apply
living
.
The Verb problem
apply
trend
of small family Use synonyms
unit
Fix the agreement mistake
units
also
leads to some drawbacks. first of all, the family relationships can grow apart. As the family Linking Words
member
are living relatively, they will not Fix the agreement mistake
members
able
to Add a missing verb
be able
remain
the relationships. As time goes by, the relationship will grow apart. Verb problem
maintain
Furthermore
, Linking Words
people
can easily suffer from Use synonyms
the
social anxiety. Correct article usage
apply
people
growing up without brothers and sisters, Use synonyms
they
usually lack social experience because family cannot provide the function of interaction. Correct pronoun usage
apply
Therefore
, Linking Words
people
can easily have Use synonyms
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
on
social interactions Change preposition
with
and
Correct word choice
which
lead
to Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
the
anxiety.
In conclusion, the Correct article usage
apply
trend
of living individual and nuclear Use synonyms
family
is Fix the agreement mistake
families
due to
the reason of limited living Linking Words
space
and the Use synonyms
raising
of Correct your spelling
rising
cost
Use synonyms
living
, and it can lead to Change preposition
of living
the
drawbacks: Correct article usage
apply
the
family relationships Correct article usage
apply
grow
apart and social anxiety.Wrong verb form
growing
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Expression Clarity
Ensure clarity and precision in your expression. For instance, 'staying in single or unclear family' could be more accurately phrased as 'opting to live alone or in nuclear families'.
Coherence
In discussing causes and effects, explicitly link your points back to the question for greater coherence. For example, explicitly state how limited living space directly influences the preference for smaller family units.
Supporting Examples
Incorporate more specific examples to support your arguments. This can enhance the effectiveness of your essay by illustrating your points more vividly.
Grammar and Accuracy
Review and revise your essay to correct grammatical inaccuracies and enhance readability. For example, 'the family member are living relatively' could be corrected to 'family members live separately'.
Structure
Your essay offers a clear structure with an introduction, development of ideas, and a conclusion, which aids understanding.
Task Response
You effectively address both parts of the question by discussing the causes and effects of the trend towards smaller family units.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example