Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

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Some individuals believe that the acquisition of another speech is only for
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
or getting a job in a foreign country.
Whereas
others agree that
this
is not the only reason. I will discuss both views in
this
essay and I strongly agree with the latter idea because it is
also
needed for higher education and some businesses. The first group claimed that learning a foreign
language
is just needed for a journey or work.
This
can be easily used when you know another
language
.
For instance
,
while
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
abroad, if you do not know about the country`s
language
or an international speech, you will not be able to communicate with people or even you can not find the way back home.
Besides
, if you work for a foreign company you need to be knowledgeable in a foreign
language
in order to connect with your colleagues and customers. The second notion about
this
issue is that it is more beneficial for learners and its advantages are more than the two mentioned.
firstly
, it is undeniable that when you know another
language
it is good for
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
and working.
secondly
Add a comma
secondly,
show examples
the more of its advantages can be
contraversial
Correct your spelling
controversial
.
For instance
, if a person wants to higher education in a
develped
Correct your spelling
developed
country
such
as England, Germany, or
france
Change the capitalization
France
show examples
, it is crucial for them to learn that country's tongue.
thirdly
, when it comes to businesses
such
as exporting products the knowledge of other languages is needed in order to communicate with people.
To sum up
,
Although
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
and working could be one of the reasons why people tend to learn another
language
, I strongly believe that it has more advantages
such
as highering a degree and some business matters.
Submitted by faeqe.h on

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sentence structure & vocabulary
Your essay clearly addresses both views on the importance of learning a foreign language, providing a balanced discussion. To further improve, consider varying your sentence structures and using synonyms to avoid repetition, enhancing readability and lexical resource.
coherence
While your essay has a strong structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, you could enhance the coherence by ensuring smoother transitions between points. Phrases like 'furthermore', 'moreover', and 'in addition to' can help create a more fluid connection between your arguments.
detailed examples
You have used relevant examples to support your arguments. For a higher score, try to include specific, detailed examples that clearly illustrate your point. These help to make your argument more persuasive and impactful.
task achievement
You have successfully addressed both views presented in the prompt, offering a balanced perspective before stating your own opinion. This shows good task achievement.
logical structure
Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs that address different viewpoints, and a conclusion that summarizes your stance, highlighting good logical structure.
coherence & cohesion
You effectively used paragraphs to organize your ideas, making your essay easy to follow and understand.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • multilingual
  • linguistic proficiency
  • globalized world
  • cross-cultural communication
  • immersive experience
  • adaptability
  • cultural exchange
  • interpersonal skills
  • employment prospects
  • empathy
  • intellectual development
  • overcome language barriers
  • global market
  • resourceful
  • life-changing
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