Many people say that globalisation and the growing number of multinational companies have a negative effection the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.

There is no doubt that these days globalisation increasing in many countries, the question is : does the soar numbers
also
the globalisation of multinational companies have nagative effect on the environment? in
this
essay l am going to explain my point of view
as well as
giving reasons and examples related to my opinion.
According to
the reasons why do I disagree on that global people does not effect badly on environment,
on the contrary
believe that positive effects outwight the negatives,
however
in spite of the overseas individuals could take amount of time to Knowing the rules and laws
furthermore
how things go in another country, they could have benefits to us.
Moreover
as I mentioned, the advantages of being in country have a huge multinational companies ,
firstly
engagement with other cultures might decline the racism
thus
of being talking or warking or studing with these individuals,
on the other hand
the cooperation our companies with them it will make rapidly progress , sharing ideas
along with
information would be the causes of great success
for example
: Space saudi company and the National Eygpt government have cooperation results of that they have fantastic answers for their questions. In conclusion ,
although
the rose numbers of multinatinals and globalisation we can solve a lot of issues by suppot and help the forgien humans, and to understand the different is nutural thing in our world.
Submitted by reem2006303 on

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task achievement
Your essay attempts to tackle the prompt but lacks a clear stance throughout the essay, which is crucial for task achievement. It's important to clearly state whether you agree or disagree with the given statement and consistently support your position throughout.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of your essay is challenging to follow due to abrupt transitions and incomplete thoughts. To improve your coherence and cohesion, consider planning your essay with clear paragraphs, each dedicated to a specific main point and supported by examples or explanations.
task achievement
Your essay lacks specific examples to support your claims. Including detailed examples strengthens your argument and demonstrates a higher level of task achievement. Try to incorporate real-life instances or hypothetical scenarios that clearly illustrate your points.
coherence cohesion
Consider working on your grammar and punctuation, as these areas impact the clarity of your message. Avoid run-on sentences and ensure proper use of commas and periods to separate ideas.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but could be strengthened. A clear thesis statement in the introduction and a summarizing conclusion that reiterates your main points and stance will make your essay more effective.
task achievement
You engage with the topic and attempt to discuss the effects of globalization and multinational companies on the environment, demonstrating relevance to the task.
task achievement
You express a willingness to consider both the positive and negative effects of globalization, which is a good approach for a balanced argument. However, focusing on developing this argument with clearer points would be beneficial.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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