Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these veiws and give your own opinion.

#people #attention #veiws

Some individuals believe that

is the strongest method that can prepare many users,

while

others think that it is not extremely attractive anymore. I believe that

is the strongest method of marketing.

While

these promotional contents can be deleted if they are not appealing.

This

essay will discuss both sides,

along with

my viewpoint.

is the main tool that has persuaded us to buy something.

This

is because most

people

strongly believe something that they hear or watch visually.

Therefore

advertisements

are still being significant method to sell products or services,

hence

, types and methods of marketing are changing day by day

according to

social development.

For example

, livestreaming is popular these days on social media and marketers often use it for their business on a daily basis.

Consequently

, there are many marketing tools,

is the strongest one to persuade users.

On the other hand

according to

technological advancement,

people

are able to choose what they watch or do not.

This

advancement offers the choice

whether

Change preposition

of whether

show examples

to watch or see

advertisements

or not.

For example

, it is possible to ignore some unnecessary marketing content by clicking a simple button.

Therefore

, some

people

usually do not care about promotional content

while

watching TV or social media channels. The majority of

people

are only interested in promotional content if they feel useful .

To conclude

, in my opinion,

advertisements

are still one of the useful methods of sales because of the fact that

people

are persuaded by them.

Conversely

, some

advertisements

can be ignored or stopped if they seem not useful for consumers.

Submitted by zulzayanyamkhu on Thu Apr 04 2024

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task achievement

Try to include more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Work on varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and keep the reader engaged. This will also demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency.

task achievement

You've done a good job of discussing both views and providing your own opinion, which meets the requirements of the task.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is clear, and you’ve made an effort to introduce and conclude your essay properly.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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