Many young people are leaving their homes in rural areas to study or work in the cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is the migration of young
people
from rural areas
to the cities
. It is clear that
the attraction of new opportunities and better living conditions has become an important part of our quickly changing world. However
, there is no absolute agreement as some believe that the disadvantages of this
development may outweigh the benefits, especially considering issues like overpopulation and decrease
in Correct article usage
a decrease
agriculture
.
One of the main positives of young people
moving to cities
is, that it provides them with new opportunities. Cities
offer a wide range of educational programs , better job prospects and access to modern technologies. For instance
, majority
of Correct article usage
the majority
young
generation in rural Correct article usage
the young
areas
may have leimited
career options, Correct your spelling
limited
whereas
cities
allow them to explore and choose a variety of occupations in different industries as
IT, business, healthcare Correct quantifier usage
such as
and
etc.
Another advantage is that Correct word choice
apply
cities
promoting
better living standards. Urban environments typically have better healthcare facilities, infrastructure and social services. Wrong verb form
promote
For example
, people
in cities
often have easier access to healthcare and education, which helps them live longer and stay healthier.
Turning to the other side of the argument, one major disadvantage is overpopulation. As more people
move to cities
, the urban population grows rapidly, putting strain on housing, public services, and transportation systems. For example
, in many large cities
, overcrowding leads to housing shortages and increased prices, making it difficult to live comfortably even for local citizens.
Another major disadvantage is the decline in agriculture
and rural development. As more young people
leave rural areas
, there are fewer people
available to work in agriculture
, which can lead to a decrease in food production and degradation in rural economies.
Having weighed everything mentioned up
, we can come to Change preposition
apply
a
conclusion that Correct article usage
the
while
the migration of young people
to cities
offers significant advantages like new opportunities and better living standards, it also
presents serious challenges such
as overpopulation and the decline of agriculture
. In the long term, it is crucial to find the balance between urban and rural development to ensure both areas
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task achievement
Overall, the essay provides a complete response to the task and presents clear and comprehensive ideas. However, to enhance the relevance of the examples, consider providing more specific and illustrative supporting details. For instance, detailing particular programs or job prospects in cities could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph maintains a clear focus and that there are smooth transitions between your points to improve coherence. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay and make it more cohesive.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a well-defined introduction and conclusion, which helps in structuring the argument effectively.
task achievement
The writer addresses both sides of the argument, discussing both the advantages and disadvantages, which contributes to a balanced task response.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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