Nowadays many people prefer to shop in supermarket rather than small shops or local markets? Is this positive or negative for development? Discuss and give your opinion.

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There is quite an obvious discussion around the topic of shopping.
While
some people believe that mega-stores are unnecessary for people who want to buy any
goods
, I would argue that
this
trend has more benefits and
comfortable
Add a missing verb
is comfortable
show examples
for consumers. I will explain my reasons in
this
essay. There is no doubt that most supermarkets provide all
goods
and well-designed layouts.
This
is because the most part of the
goods
are located in the appropriate department, which can make it convenient for customers to find a product.
For example
, in Australia, Coles supermarket can provide all
goods
such
as dairy-free, gluten-free and nut-free in each department that can be easy to find from buyers.
As a result
, that can make all customers less spend time on their shopping
while
they have to go to work or have to look after their kids. It is worth pointing out that mega-stores are necessary for buyers who would like to buy a greater number of products.
This
is based on the fact that shopping in a big supermarket that can
also
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
offer a special price to buy all products.
For instance
, Costco Wholesale can provide the price of their
goods
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
a decent price
while
their membership customers buy a large number of products at that time.
Consequently
, many supermarkets offer special a discount system by encouraging people with membership cards. In conclusion, we can observe that shopping in a big supermarket has a lot of benefits for consumers
that
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
can be a convenient location for
goods
and decent prices.
Overall
, I firmly believe that
this
trend is a positive development.
Submitted by v.mahatkomol on

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task response
Remember to directly address both sides of the argument to fully meet the task requirement. Although you mentioned an opposing view briefly in the introduction, expanding on this aspect could strengthen your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Try to introduce more varied and complex sentence structures to improve the readability and flow of your essay.
vocabulary
Enhance your essay by including a wider range of vocabulary, specifically synonyms for commonly repeated words, to make your argument more compelling.
content
Effectively used specific examples, such as Coles and Costco, to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Structured your essay clearly with an introduction, body paragraphs focusing on different points, and a conclusion.
task response
Successfully addressed the prompt by discussing the advantages of shopping in a supermarket and stating your opinion on why it is a positive development.
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