Many university students nowadays live away from home and their parents because of their university location, while others live with their families. What are the advantages and disadvantages of each situation?
One
of the most prevalent trends in the contemporary world is the cumulative increase in relocation
of students from Add an article
the relocation
one
city to another or abroad for their higher studies. The argument whether
it is beneficial for children to spend their Change preposition
about whether
life
away from their parents for education has been gathering momentum across the world in recent times. It is completely agreed that a quality education is must
to shape Correct article usage
a must
one
's life
and for this
, some folks leave their homes and move to another place and spend their life
in the absence of their family. I will provide an overview on
both Change preposition
of
advanvtages
and disadvantages of Correct your spelling
advantages
this
notion and will reach into
a logical conclusion.
Change preposition
apply
Firstly
, when folks will
live outside of their house, they will get Verb problem
apply
chance
to learn new skills Correct article usage
a chance
everyday
from their peers and it will be easy for them to mould Replace the word
every day
according to
different situations in their life
in future when they will get marry
and manage Wrong verb form
married
family
and work Correct article usage
a family
life
as living away will make them more independent and they will be responsible for their household chorus
Correct your spelling
chores
such
as cooking, cleaning and managing their finances. Moreover
, scholars will be able to enhance their interpersonal skills by taking part in social activities in universities, by
joining different student clubs which in turn will increase the social network of pupils. Correct word choice
and by
For example
, in hostel life
, it is very easy to learn basic living rules such
as get
up early in the morning as Wrong verb form
getting
one
has to wait in the queue to take shower
and for breakfast. It teaches folks to maintain Correct article usage
a shower
daily
routine, Add an article
a daily
sense
of sharing and keep patience Correct article usage
a sense
while
waiting in the queue for meals.
Secondly
, staying at home
has its own benefits as one
can learn from the parents or ancestors. Emotional support is must
during university Correct article usage
a must
life
as some students feel stressed due to
pressure
of Correct article usage
the pressure
study
and they feel Wrong verb form
studying
embarrased
to discuss with their peers or teachers which has given birth to many suicides in the past. Correct your spelling
embarrassed
Furthermore
, living at home
while
studying can help to save money on accommodation and food and provide substantial financial relief to parents.
To sum up
, I believe that it is important to stay away from home
while
studying as it helps masses
to participate in Correct article usage
the masses
late night
group activities or group studies Add a hyphen
late-night
happen
in universities as it Verb problem
apply
give
Change the verb form
gives
chance
to learn in Correct article usage
a chance
more
effective way rather than sitting alone and learning in the Add an article
a more
home
.Submitted by kaurv083 on
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coherence cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structures more; although your use of complex sentences is good, incorporating a wider range of syntactical constructions can add to the stylistic richness of your writing.
task achievement
Be mindful of occasional spelling or grammatical errors, such as "advanvtages" and the use of "folks" in a slightly informal context. While these do not significantly detract from the overall quality, attention to detail can refine your essay further.
coherence cohesion
Consider providing more explicit comparison or explicit connective phrases between advantages and disadvantages when switching from one point to the other. This will enhance the logical flow and make your argumentation even clearer.
task achievement
Though your examples are relevant, try to include more varied and specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Particularly in the section discussing the benefits of living at home, adding specific, illustrative examples could make your case more convincing.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a good grasp of the topic with a well-structured argument, presenting both sides thoughtfully.
coherence cohesion
You effectively use paragraphs and transitions to organize your ideas, which significantly aids the readability and coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your arguments, reinforcing the position taken at the beginning. Excellent work in bringing closure to your discussion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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