IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

A company has announced that it wishes to build a large factory near your locality. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory establishment? Explain your position.

#company #factory #locality #influence #community #support #establishment #position
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In the modern world nowadays industry plays a significant role and
this
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 is indicated by the number of
factories
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. A firm stated that they are willing to construct a huge one in our vicinity. There are some advantages like availability and cost-effectiveness
along with
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 minor disadvantages
such
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 as pollution and crowd in
this
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 regard that existing of the factory nearby outdo lack of it. On the one hand, governments are seriously attempting to construct new
factories
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 and some of them can be built near residential
areas
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 like the one that has already been announced which can have some side effects. Basically, there should be some procedures in states restricting these kinds of actions and rather building them at a certain distance from the residential
areas
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due to
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 their possible pollution in the future which can harm people.
Moreover
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, it is not considered to be well-designed or constructed for the sight of tourists in the case of existing
factories
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 inside the urban or rural
areas
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 and they may blame the authorities for
such
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 an action.
On the other hand
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, from the industry point of view, factory proliferation throughout the countries is considered highly positive in terms of industrialization. Absolutely, these amenities help states to produce revenue and use it for the countries' infrastructures
therefore
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, it does not matter if they are located next to civil
areas
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 unless it has some harm to the people nearby
such
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 as Lead
factories
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 in some places.
Also
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, it prevents joblessness of the residents who are in a close radius of it which can help them with transportation costs.
Although
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 there are shreds of evidence that show some negligible impacts on the public, in my opinion, existing of
such
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 constructions and facilities aids whoever is living in the vicinity with accessibility to work and transport fares and its benefits outweigh the probable drawbacks which will be potentially posed.
Submitted by keyhan454 on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. This will make your essay stronger and more convincing.
coherence & cohesion
Avoid repetition of phrases. Try to vary your language to make your essay more engaging.
task achievement
Consider a more balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, to fully address the task requirements.
coherence & cohesion
You have a good structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence & cohesion
Your overall position is clear and you've provided a summary of the key points in your argument.
task achievement
You've effectively communicated the general benefits and drawbacks of having a factory near a community.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • local economy
  • economic activity
  • employment opportunities
  • infrastructure
  • environmental impact
  • ecosystems
  • traffic congestion
  • property values
  • industrial aesthetic
  • rejuvenate
  • quality of life
  • pollution
  • wildlife habitats
  • suppliers
  • contractors
  • influx
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