Beside a lot of advantages, some people believe that the Internet creates many problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Most of the
people
think that the Internet
causes many problems
. From my point of view, I partially agree with this
statement. In my opinion, the Internet
has some beneficial sides, while
also
it can cause some problems
.
First of all, with the Internet
, mankind can access everything easily, such
as communication
. To my mind, communicating with someone without any interrupting is the best thing which internet
serves us. In the past, people
could not share information, although
they had just newspapers and magazines. Nevertheless
, today we can do significant increases in the business with the help of smooth communication
. Also
, it makes communication
cheaper, so we use some applications, such
as WhatsApp, Messenger and Gmail for texting. Also
, it does not take too much time. Nowadays, these apps are useful for huge companies too. For example
, according to
the “Businessman” journal, 85% of marketing companies utilize Gmail for their communication
system.
On the other hand
, the Internet
has some bad sides like stealing private information. Today, artificial intelligence is popular all over the world and it increases a
number of users day by day. Change the article
the
Although
, some people
do not know that it will create some disasters for the world. With this
new invention, our private things are not secure. Even it can use our voice and photos to make some videos. For example
, in Canada, a man stole the credit card information with the help of the voice of the owner of the card in 2022.
In conclusion, the Internet
brought some good things to mankind, as well as
many problems
. Among them, it broke the distance among people
and may cause some safety problems
. If we utilize it carefully, it will make our life easier.Submitted by gular.taghiyeva on
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coherence cohesion
The logical structure is somewhat clear but could be more cohesive. Try to use more transition words and phrases to link your ideas together smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows naturally into the next. For instance, clearly connect the second paragraph’s benefits of the Internet with the third paragraph’s issues.
task achievement
While you have addressed the task and provided relevant examples, try to elaborate more on your points to fully achieve the task requirements. Extend the examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
You have included both an introduction and a conclusion, which gives your essay a clear beginning and ending.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are generally well-organized within each paragraph.
task achievement
You have included relevant and specific examples to support your points.
task achievement
Your response is quite clear and comprehensive, covering both the advantages and disadvantages of the Internet.