Life now is better than it was 100 years ago. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statment? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.
Several individuals prefer working for long
hours
and as a result
, they don’t get enough time for leisure activities. Making a good career and creating a competitive edge over colleagues are the biggest advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
while
mental health
issues and developing bad habits are the primary disadvantages of this
phenomenon.
To commence with, nowadays competition in the job
market is fierce, and it is very difficult for employees to get promotion
or find a Fix the agreement mistake
promotions
job
with a good salary. Therefore
, to sustain the job
they have and to get a raise, workers often choose to work
beyond their regular job
hours
. Consequently
, employees who show more dedication towards their job
by working for long hours
, create a competitive edge over their colleagues. For example
, as per the
recent study, most managers tend to have a positive image Correct article usage
a
for
employees who Change preposition
of
work
after job
hours
.
Although
working for more hours
is advantageous for better career prospects, it shouldn’t be prioritized at the cost of leisure and fun activities. To explain in detail, leisure activities like light exercise, going for small trips, spending
quality time with family all have a significant impact on physical and mental Correct word choice
and spending
well being
. Since many people suffer from mental Add a hyphen
well-being
health
issues due to
long working hours
, they start smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol to cope with the stress. This
is why, working for long hours
is not recommended when mental and physical health
get compromised.
In conclusion, even though spending extended hours
at work
may increase the chances of getting promoted or getting a pay raise, its adverse effects on mental and physical health
should be taken into consideration while
deciding to Correct word choice
when
work
for long hours
. Additionally
, developing the habit of drinking and smoking to reduce the
stress at Correct article usage
apply
work
is never a good option either in the short run or in the long run.Submitted by aayushvsanghvi8 on
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Language use
Try to include a wider range of vocabulary to better express your ideas and make your arguments more compelling.
Task achievement
Ensure that your examples are detailed and directly relevant to the main argument you are presenting for stronger support of your ideas.
Language use
To further enhance the effectiveness of your essay, consider varying your sentence structures more. This will add complexity and sophistication to your writing.
Task achievement
Remember to include a balanced discussion when the question asks for arguments on both sides. This includes dedicating equal parts of your essay to discussing both the advantages and disadvantages, even if you have a strong opinion one way.
Coherence and cohesion
You've done an excellent job organizing your essay in a coherent manner with clear logical structure and smooth transitions between paragraphs.
Coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are effectively presented, rounding off the essay nicely and reinforcing your stance.
Task Achievement
Your response to the task is complete, with clear, comprehensive ideas supported by relevant examples.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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