Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both side and give your opinions.
A certain majority of
people
believe that exercise
is the main point for health while
others believe that having a maintained diet
plan is more important. I personally believe that Botha is a major factor in living life
. In this
essay, I will discuss both views and I give you my opinion.
On the one hand, nowadays more and more people
are engaged in exercise
for their health life
. majority of people
believe that exercise
is the key point of a healthy life
. For instance
, there for more people
are joining the gym
. they go to the gym
for at least a couple of months a day. Spend two, or three hours in the gym
and they play to the heavy exercise
for their healthy life
. This
way people
can take good healthy and maintain their body.
Moreover
, other ones who do not engage to
that Change preposition
in
gym
and they
love to do physical Correct pronoun usage
apply
exercise
Change the noun form
exercises
such
as work
out or yoga and meditation Wrong verb form
working
they
believe Correct pronoun usage
apply
that
is
they can control healthy lives. As an example, someone loves to work one or two hours on the way.it is Unnecessary verb
apply
also
more beneficial to life
. It also
burns fat and can live a good health
Replace the word
healthy
life
.
On the other hand
, these days more and more people
love to have a good healthy life
. Therefore
they are trying to eat diet
food. It is more beneficial than trying to stop eating fast food and more carbohydrates. For example
, some of them take a advice
from a nutrition doctor. They give good advice and give them Remove the article
advice
a piece of advice
a bit of advice
diet
plans too. In addition
, people
who are be
a good healthy and they are don't have noncommunicable diseases.
In conclusion, Change the verb form
are
exercise
and diet
plans is
always needed to combine to the Change the verb form
are
people
good
healthy Correct article usage
a good
life
. In my opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
is
both are very important for Unnecessary verb
apply
people
good healthy life
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task achievement
Your essay covers both sides of the argument and provides a clear stance, demonstrating a solid response to the task. To further improve, make sure to expand your viewpoints with detailed explanations and enrich your argument with more varied examples.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a good structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. For better coherence, try using more linking words and phrases to smoothly transition between ideas and paragraphs.
supported main points
While supporting your main points, add more depth to your arguments by including precise examples and demonstrating how they are relevant to the topic. This will make your essay more persuasive and engaging.
task achievement
Your essay provides a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument, which is essential for this type of task.
introduction conclusion present
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your essay nicely and presents your overall stance effectively.