Many people believe that a person’s culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that it has only minor influence. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #person’s #culture #country #origin #influence

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People

Use synonyms

’s opinions differ about

degree

Add an article

the degree

show examples

influence

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motherland’s

Correct article usage

the motherland’s

show examples

culture

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

person

Correct article usage

a person

show examples

. Personally, I believe that the

culture

Use synonyms

of our country of origin has less effect on us, rather than other things.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both sides of

this

Linking Words

view, and will widely explain the reasons to support my opinion based on

real life

Add a hyphen

real-life

show examples

examples. On the one hand, some

people

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believe that the birth nation has an important role in setting an individual’s

culture

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due to

Linking Words

several reasons. The supporters of

this

Linking Words

point of view are sure that one’s behaviour starts to develop in the womb.

Linking Words

Finally

Add a comma

Finally,

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they say:

people

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learn the

culture

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even before they were born.

Although

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

people

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travel everywhere and even live

Change preposition

show examples

the other side of

world

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the world

show examples

, they will always be connected to their motherland, since they developed an emotional attachment

with

Change preposition

show examples

their birth place’s

culture

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For example

Linking Words

, Irina

Sheyk

Correct your spelling

Shayk

, a very popular fashion model from Russia, even though, she spent most of her life in

United

Correct article usage

the United

show examples

States of America,

she

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

never lost her love towards Russian traditional cuisine or wear.

For

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

reason, many

people

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think that an individual’s birthplace plays a dramatic role in defining the

culture

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On the other hand

Linking Words

, the opponents of

this

Linking Words

, including me, think that native location has a minor

influence

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on behaviour development. Many researches have proved that humans are capable of adapting to any conditions and traditions. There is even a proverb

such

Linking Words

as “

Don”t

Correct your spelling

Don't

go to someone”s monastery with your rules”. Many

people

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prefer to stick to foreign traditions, where they live and forget about their

owns

Replace the word

own

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, I’ve met many

kazakh

Change the capitalization

Kazakh

show examples

families, which

live

Wrong verb form

have lived

show examples

several

Change preposition

for several

show examples

years in

United

Correct article usage

the United

show examples

Kingdom, and they are fond of

english

Change the capitalization

English

show examples

life

culture

Use synonyms

, their practicality and callousness, which totally contradict

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

kazakh’s

Change noun form

kazakh

show examples

lifestyle.

Due to

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

trend in society, I strongly believe that native locations have less

influence

Use synonyms

in defining the character of the person. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

some

people

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think that the

culture

Use synonyms

of an individual depends on their

birthplaces

Fix the agreement mistake

birthplace

show examples

, it has been increasingly noticed that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

humans are adapting to various cultures

due to

Linking Words

their location

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

today or

their

Change the word

the

show examples

influence

Use synonyms

of globalization.

Submitted by perizatyelemessova on Sat Apr 06 2024

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Vocabulary

Try to diversify your vocabulary by using synonyms and avoiding repetition of the same words or phrases to improve the richness of your language.

Grammar

Pay close attention to consistency in tense usage throughout your essay to maintain clarity and coherence.

Grammar

Consider using a wider range of grammatical structures to add variety to your writing and demonstrate a high level of English competency.

Content Development

Be sure to fully develop your examples with more detailed explanation. While the examples you provide are relevant, expanding on them could further strengthen your argument.

Punctuation

Work on your punctuation, especially the use of commas and periods, to enhance the readability of your sentences.

Structure

You have a good structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which makes your essay easy to follow.

Task Response

You successfully discussed both views on the topic and provided a clear personal stance, effectively fulfilling the task requirements.

Examples

Your use of examples, such as the reference to Irina Sheyk and Kazakh families in the UK, effectively supports your arguments.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

356 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural norms
Values
Traditions
Practices
Festivities
Cuisine
Language
Religion
Beliefs
Social systems
Institutions
Globalization
Media influence
Multicultural societies
Migration
Personal choices
Experiences
Education
Knowledge exchange
Economic factors
Homogenized
Cultural identity
Geographically concentrated
Individualism
Collectivism

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Many people believe that a person’s culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that it has only minor influence. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

More and more people use private cars instead of taking public transport . What are the reasons for this thread? How can the government encourage people to take public transport?

Topic 2: These days many families move to other countries for work. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this move. However, others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Should private schools receive government funding? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building the live in. What are the reason for this? How can people research this?

Many people use distance-learning programmes (study material, post, TV, the Internet, etc.) to study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the same benefits of attending college or university. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?