By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilty of commiting murder.Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers.

Some folks believe that the killers should be given
life
imprisonment rather than a death sentence to avoid
further
murders in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
.I tend to disagree with
this
statement because of the fact that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
strict decisions are needed to purify
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
from criminals.There are various reasons for
this
argument. First of all, many people who are jailed on the charges of murder get away with the penalty by using their influence.
This
is true in countries with weak judicial
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
.
For instance
, when a landlord's son in Pakistan was awarded a
life
in prison
last
year by
lower
Correct article usage
a lower
show examples
judiciary,the rich landlord used his influence to bribe the lawyers and family of the bereaved and got his son released after a few months.
Secondly
, the murderers who are sent to prison are still a risk for other prisoners locked up for minor crimes.They have the tendency to do harm to others and will do so whenever given a chance again.We often hear the news of fighting in jail with some folks inflicting fatal injuries to their inmates.
Thirdly
, the
life
sentence for the murderer is a source of discontentment for
relatives
Correct article usage
the relatives
show examples
of the victim.
Also
, they remain constantly under threat from
Correct article usage
the kins
show examples
kins
Fix the agreement mistake
kin
show examples
of the jailed individual.They are warned of the consequences if they
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
forgive the accused.
Moreover
, if a killer is given a death sentence, it will discourage other members of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
to commit
Change preposition
from committing
show examples
a homicide.
For instance
,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
countries like
Saudia
Correct your spelling
Saudi
show examples
Arabia where the killers are hanged have
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
less
Fix the agreement mistake
low
show examples
rate of murders than other
nation states
Add a hyphen
nation-states
show examples
. To summarize, the fear of
life
is more than the fear of imprisonment.
This
helps in discouraging
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people from
commiting
Correct your spelling
committing
murders and is beneficial in creating a crime-free
society
.
Submitted by alishah2294 on

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Task Achievement
Aim to present a more balanced view, addressing both sides of the argument clearly before arriving at your conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure your essay is structured properly with clearly separated paragraphs, each presenting a unique point.
Linguistic Range
Use a wider range of sentence structures and lexical resources to improve clarity and engagement.
Task Achievement
Be cautious with generalizations and make sure to back up your arguments with concrete evidence or examples.
Task Achievement
You've made a strong case by citing specific examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay maintains a clear position throughout, demonstrating a consistent point of view.
Task Achievement
The use of real-world examples to support your points is commendable.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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