Many cities are currently facing a serious housing shortage. What are some of the reasons for this shortage and what solution can you suggest.

#cities #shortage

In recent years, a lot of towns have

trouble

Add a missing verb

had trouble

show examples

with no

houses

send

Verb problem

apply

show examples

life

Replace the word

live

show examples

Change preposition

in.

show examples

Although

the government in each

cities

Change to a singular noun

city

show examples

are tackling

this

problem, it is too far to solve from the current position.

This

essay will be about why it occurs and my suggestion for it. One of the reasons

Change preposition

for

show examples

the

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

houses

is that there are no territories to build them on the earth. It is said that there are more than

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

eight

buillion ctitizens

Correct your spelling

billion citizens

around the world now and the

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

number

would be

Wrong verb form

show examples

massive. In

addtion

Correct your spelling

addition

big

Correct article usage

a big

show examples

population, individuals are required to

send

Correct your spelling

spend

show examples

their

dailiy

Correct your spelling

daily

lives with other creatures. The animals

also

would like to

alive

Correct your spelling

live

show examples

in bigger places

It is clear that

in order to solve

housing

Correct article usage

the housing

show examples

shortage, people have to expand the places to live in.

However

, it costs

much

Correct quantifier usage

a lot of

show examples

money and takes

long

Change the article

a long

show examples

time too much even though the number of people

are

Change the verb form

show examples

bigger and bigger. Developing new

Additionally

, the

lcak

Correct your spelling

lack

architectures

Fix the agreement mistake

architecture

show examples

relates to

cause

Verb problem

apply

show examples

the shortage of

house

Fix the agreement mistake

houses

show examples

. The recent young tend to work at the offices. Physical jobs are likely to be hated by them

due to

the trends.

Fostoring

Correct your spelling

Fostering

the builder of

house

Add an article

the house

a house

show examples

must take

long

Change the article

a long

show examples

time and is not realistic

Change preposition

show examples

the current

sitution

Correct your spelling

situation

that people want to live in as soon as possible. To find a possibility to solve

serious

Add an article

a serious

show examples

problem, I suggest

to renovate

Change the verb form

renovating

show examples

the

used-house

Correct your spelling

used house

show examples

no one living in.

That

Correct determiner usage

Houses

show examples

houses

are not essential to rebuild again

fron

Correct your spelling

from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

scratch so costs are saved

as a result

Also

, it is said that the more growing the number of

such

houses

is, the more increasing

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

crime is

stimulately

Correct your spelling

stimulated

Therefore

the renovation of

houses

would the city more comfortable to

send

Verb problem

live

show examples

life

Change preposition

in.

show examples

In conclusion,

from

Change the preposition

show examples

my opinion, the government should

firstlyinvest

Correct your spelling

firstly invest

first invest

more money

Change preposition

show examples

the changing inside of

used-

Correct your spelling

used houses

show examples

houses

rather than on

expand

Change the form of the verb

expanding

show examples

the

teritorries

Correct your spelling

territories

or growing the

architectures

Fix the agreement mistake

architecture

show examples

Submitted by takeru1626 on Sun Apr 07 2024

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coherence cohesion

Consider revising for clear sentence structure to improve logical flow and readability.

coherence cohesion

Work on organizing your essay with a more clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion to enhance the structure and flow.

coherence cohesion

Ensure your main points are clearly supported with specific examples or explanations to strengthen your argument.

task achievement

Address the task directly with a clearer stance and more focused response to ensure all parts of the prompt are fully answered.

task achievement

Aim for clear and comprehensive ideas, carefully developing your argument with specific details and examples.

task achievement

You've addressed both parts of the question by discussing causes and suggesting a solution.

task achievement

Your essay engages with a relevant topic and attempts to provide thoughtful insights.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
46Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

317 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many cities are currently facing a serious housing shortage. What are some of the reasons for this shortage and what solution can you suggest.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

With the increasing use and development of new technology, many machines are now able to do the work which people used to perform. DO ADV >< DISADV

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others believe actions can ben taken to bring about a change. Discuss both and give your opinion.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?