There are some violent cartoon characters on TV, which brings negative influence to children. Do you agree or disagree? What type of TV programmes are suitable for children?

#cartoon #characters #tv #influence #children #type #programmes

In the contemporary era, children watch content on Television which can be intimidating to the young

mind

. I reckon that some

kind

Fix the agreement mistake

kinds

show examples

of broadcasts are not suitable for kids. They should be watching

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

programmes that improve their creativity rather

destroy

Correct word choice

than destroy

show examples

it.

To begin

with, the violence demonstrated by the cartoon characters brings various negative effects. The biggest shortcoming is that it decreases the analytical ability. When violence occupies a young

mind

then

it kills the reasoning power of

mind

Add an article

the mind

show examples

For example

, some kids start yelling at their parents or their friends after getting influenced

from

Change preposition

show examples

cartoons. They do not think about reasons why they should not be behaving in a certain way, but they just act that way. Many studies suggest that numerous brain cells die because of anger.

This

leads to the creation of a young generation which does not possess skills that some of their

other

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

peers hold.

Conversely

, kids need to watch shows that promote language development and reasoning abilities.

For instance

, some channels provide foreign language training in a musical way. It could not only entertain them but

also

teach them in a creative manner.

Consequently

a children

Correct the article-noun agreement

children

a child

show examples

can excel in various fields with

such

kind of training. To illustrate it, Cocomelon is the most popular of all shows which comes in various languages, it makes rhymes for teaching maths and other subjects.

To sum up

, violence has deteriorating effects on

human

Correct article usage

the human

show examples

mind

specifically on the intellectual horizon.

This

can be ameliorated by watching content that

stimuates

Correct your spelling

stimulates

analytical abilities

such

as foreign language learning at a young age might change the whole scenario.

Submitted by Kiran on Sun Apr 07 2024

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Example and Explanation

Make sure your examples are directly linked to the points you're trying to make to strengthen your arguments.

Task Response

In your introduction, directly state your agreement or disagreement to the prompt for a clearer stance.

Language Usage

Try to vary your sentence structure more to enhance the readability and interest of your essay.

Content Development

You've done well in arguing your points by connecting the impact of TV programmes on children's analytical abilities and behaviour.

Constructive Suggestions

Good job in suggesting alternative programmes and explaining how they can positively affect children.

Conclusion

Your conclusion succinctly summarizes your points and suggests a solution, reinforcing your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

268 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

detrimental effect
formative years
impressionable
emulate
aggressive behaviors
psychological development
creative expression
exaggerated scenarios
parental guidance
cognitive development
moral values
cultural awareness
healthy lifestyle choices
emotional intelligence
age-appropriate

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There are some violent cartoon characters on TV, which brings negative influence to children. Do you agree or disagree? What type of TV programmes are suitable for children?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Most societies are based on rules and laws. If individuals were free to do whatever they wanted, society could not function. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that children of all ages should have extra responsibilities (for example, helping at home or at work). Others believe that, outside of school, children should be free to enjoy their lives.

Many developed countries are giving financial aid to poor countries. However, this hasn’t solved the problem of poverty in these nations and so other types of help are needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Some people believe teenagers should focus on all subjects equally, whereas other people think that they should concentrate on only those subjects that they find interesting and they are best at. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn the culture of other people. We can learn just as much from books, films and the internet. Do you agree or disagree?