Some people think that sports play an important role in society. Others think they are nothing more than a leisure activity.’ Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Various
sports
are played by
people
around the globe.
While
a comparatively small segment of the demographic engages in
such
activity directly,
sports
does
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do
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play a crucial
role
in
the
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apply
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human development.
This
essay will outline how
sports
activities
are beneficial to
the
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apply
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mankind. It is
the
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a
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know
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known
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fact that the opportunities one gets
,
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apply
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if he becomes a successful athlete, are far
less
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fewer
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compared to traditional careers that
people
pursue. And even if one is successful it comes with a cost, as
activities
related to sport cost a fortune both to an individual
as well as
the government. The equipment and infrastructure needed in the journey to become a master in
this
field require a ton of money.
Thus
, the risk outweighs the reward and
therefore
people
consider
sports
as a pastime activity. A recent article in Hindustan
times
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Times
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newspaper claimed that one out of a thousand
cricket
players are selected
in
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for
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the Indian
cricket
team.
While
it is true that most individuals consider
sports
as a fun time, it is
also
known that sport plays a crucial
role
in
the
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apply
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motivating a person and helps with
economic
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the economic
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development of a country. It is because of various
sports
activities
that
people
come together to support their team, which ignites the flame
to
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of
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nationalism. A successful sportsperson is considered by many
people
as their
role
model in life and they motivate
people
to stay healthy and fit. Various domestic and international
tournament
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tournaments
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and competitions play a huge
role
to increase
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in increasing
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the revenue of the government.
Such
competitive
activities
nurture various businesses in a country directly and indirectly, which is a win-win situation for all.
Cricket
, a popular sport in India, is considered a religion here.
According to
a recent survey,
sports
channels are watched 60% more than the rest,
on
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of
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the
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apply
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television in India.
This
survey
also
declared that BCCI, the authority figure for
cricket
in India, is the richest Board in the world and generates a revenue of INR 10,000 crore for the nation.
To conclude
, it is true that pursuing
sports
as a career can cause a dent in the pocket at an individual level, but on the flip
side
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side,
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it can
also
be a turn-around story for a nation on a broader scale. I would recommend the government
to
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apply
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come up with various subsidies to encourage
sports
enthusiasts.
Submitted by niravfb1987 on

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task achievement
Although your essay addresses the task well by discussing both views and giving your opinion, it would be beneficial to further refine your arguments by providing more specific examples and evidence to support your points. This will make your essay more persuasive and impactful.
coherence cohesion
Your essay's structure is sound, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs that support your thesis, and a conclusion. To enhance coherence, consider using a wider range of linking phrases and transitional words to better connect your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction sets the stage well for the discussion, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your arguments and restates your opinion, which strengthens the coherence of your essay.
task achievement
You've done a good job of including relevant examples and statistics to support your arguments, particularly with references to the popularity of cricket in India and the financial aspect of sports. This adds depth to your discussion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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